RSS Feed for This PostCurrent Article

Are Condoms Stimulative?

By Larry Johnson on January 27, 2009 at 6:09 PM in Current Affairs

I am not sure who pisses me off more? Obama’s team for touting condoms as part of an “Economic Stimulus” package or the Republicans for making an issue of it. So, is a condom stimulative (of the economy that is)?

For starters let’s be clear this is not a debate about whether or not “ribbed” condoms provide better stimulation. Let’s look at the economics of the issue–both direct and indirect.

On the direct side of the equation is the immediate benefit to the company/companies that manufacture condoms. The proposed expenditure appears to be a short-term deal. In other words, it is not likely to increase the demand over the long term that in turn would inspire the condom makers to hire more people making penis protectors.

A big condom order will ensure the manufacturers will be able to stay in business for at least another year. The influx of cash will make it way into the pocket of the owners and employees of the condom makers. Some of that cash will go to pay the vendors who supply utilities, raw materials and transportation.

If more guys are wearing condoms does that mean the economy is doing well? I am not sure. If the wearing of the condom is preceded by dinner, a movie or drinks then we can expect a boon to the service industry. But if more people are having safe sex that means less money for doctors and the pharmaceutical industry. Companies like Pfizer, for example, may see a pop in sales of Viagra (i.e., ensure a solid tent pole for the tent) but a decline in the drug cocktail to combat AIDs.

Looks like a minor boost to me.

We may be better off economically without condoms. The spread of Sexually Transmitted Diseases will help put more money into the health care industry. Doctors, nurses, and drug companies–not to mention the housekeepers in hospitals–will be kept extra busy if there is more sex without condoms.

Also offers a better long term stimulus. Why? Pregnancy. New mommies and daddies will need to buy lots of new stuff to meet the needs of a new baby–clothes, food, toys, car seat, diapers and baby furniture. Will expecting parents (or parent) want to spruce up a nursery? If so, that means painters, electricians and rug merchants will get a taste as well.

In thinking about it, condoms are a stupid stimulus for the economy. Even extra thin with tasty lubricant will not ensure we get the big boom–you know, economic growth rather than orgasm.

  • wodiej

    In thinking about it, condoms are a stupid stimulus for the economy. Even extra thin with tasty lubricant will not ensure we get the big boom–you know, economic growth rather than orgasm.

    oh geez….LMAO…I can’t wait to read all the comments for this thread!

    Pelosi stated that preventing births would keep population down and help the economy because not as many people would be consuming. Huh?

    • oowawa

      Condoms may be a stupid stimulus for the economy, but I think few would argue that abstinence would stimulate even less.

      • Ferd Berfle

        LMAO. But then, maybe we’d have a few less bots, huh?

        • JustMe

          for what I have seen many high rollers share it around more than normal !! and not just with their wives….

          • Ferd Berfle

            LOL and yuck. That is way too much information.

            • JustMe

              LOL ferd this hit the wrong spot was supposed to be a reply to beebop lower down!

              • Ferd Berfle

                It worked good at both spots. LOL

    • tek

      Obie is already backing down on this. Kos and ThinkProgress are having a conniption fit. Really, it’s a worthwhile program but it doesn’t belong in the stimulus package.

    • POdVet

      Wouldn’t a picture of Pelosi in every guys wallet be more cost efficient? Take her out for the dinner and movie…then look at that little picture in your wallet, and instant ED even the little blue pill couldn’t combat.

      But seriously, this has to be some kind of stupid F’in joke. Somebody just find out who’s relative is a major stockholder in Trojan and throw the bastard in prison!

  • Obama: Dubya II – Electric Boogaloo

    Sorry, but I’m a firm believer in stiff competition…

  • KmX

    The federal government needs to get out of the business of funding contraceptives and abortions. There are enough Not For Profit organizations and charities that can provide funding for all that.

    Why should American Tax payers money go to Overseas groups to fund China One child per family abortion quotas?

    All the republicans need to do is let Nancy Pelosi promote the stimulus pork and then crticize her. If they criticize Obama the media will only attack them. So get Nancy Peolosi and Reid to promote it and then go after them.

    • Ferd Berfle

      Why should American Tax payers money go to Overseas groups to fund China One child per family abortion quotas?

      Uh, because extra people on a crowded planet are just that–exta people using up precious resources, irrespective of their nationality.

      You need to get your head around “we only have one planet and it has a finite amount of useable resources”.

      • beebop

        I don’t know about that Ferd, Kimosabe might want to get off his high horse for a while and quit trying to run the world. He’s having enough problems at home …. imho

        • Ferd Berfle

          Mea culpa. I should have made myself a little more clear in my post. My comment was directed to the naive remark made concerning quotas.

          That being said, I do think contraception should be part of another bill.

          • beebop

            Maybe the man who father the brood of eight would like to take a “shot” at being the spokesman? :)

            • Ferd Berfle

              ROFL

    • tek

      I didn’t know our money went to fund abortions in China. What are the Chinese doing with all the millions they’re making from sell cheap junk to Americans?

      • POdVet

        Buying politicians of course!

  • Peggy Sue

    Nice piece of snark, Larry. We gotta laugh to keep out of those padded rooms. My take? We’re all being screwed by this “stimulus” package.

    And just to clarify: I’m all for contraception and family planning. But not here, not now. It makes a mockery of the whole discussion.

    But as I understand it there are 206 amendments to the bill, many of which are dubious [to say the least] to the spirit of the program, that is: a maximized “jolt” to the economy.

    I guess it depends on your definition of “jolt.”

    So, glad this is a brand new “era” we’ve entered. But why does it feel and sound like more of the same???

    Good grief!

    • socalannie

      LMAO! What a funny thread!

      But why does it feel and sound like more of the same???

      I agree with Peggy Sue…O is the dem version of Bush. No change.

      • Docelder

        O is the dem version of Bush. No change.

        Yes, he is like the “mirror image” of Bush… completely the opposite, yet curiously exactly the same in effect.

  • JustMe

    LOL Larry same thoughts went through my mind this morning geuss both ways work right! LOL sorry for the pun…

  • raz

    According to Ms Pelosi, condoms prevent the birth of those who are a drain of society. That is her explanation of how they stimulate the economy. They prevent the people who are not “of her class” from being born in the first place.

    • Ferd Berfle

      If that’s the case, her “class” will soon become woefully inbred and will have to refer to father figures as uncle dad. I would recommend genetics counseling for them, but the gene pool is shallow enough without their further contributions.

    • lark

      Exactly. Government replaces God. And then she goes to Mass and takes communion with people who she detests and detest her. Blessings on her by the tons, including lots of money. Money fame and glory are her blessings.

      No blessings for you.

  • Sassy

    Very funny, Larry!
    Maybe they figure that when every one is out of a job, broke, and have to stay home, it could produce a population explosion…like those snow-storms.

  • IndyPUMA

    I think Family Planning initiatives are wonderful and should be pursued by this administration in a big way…. but this bill shouldn’t be the vehicle for this.

    I have seen so many numbers thrown about wrt how awesome condoms would be for our economy or how it sucks. I’m not convinced this will bring REAL stimulus to our ailing economy. For this bill… it’s clearly pork and fat.

    I also feel like the Dems (PBO) are going to use this bill to push through all their other “ideas”… some of the ideas are great, but just don’t belong in this bill.

    I think it should be laser focused (Eric Cantor coined it this way today) and should ONLY focus on job preservation and creation in a measurable means for both long term and short term.

    Infrastructure infrastructure infrastructure!!!

    • Ferd Berfle

      I think Family Planning initiatives are wonderful and should be pursued by this administration in a big way…. but this bill shouldn’t be the vehicle for this…
      Infrastructure infrastructure infrastructure!!!

      You are spot on.

  • I’m a Linda too

    Not as far as I’m aware.

    And seriously, there is an unbelievable amount of pork in this “Stimulus” bill, that stimulus is only on the special interests receiving the payola, which may explain the NEED FOR CONDOMS for those select few.

    What just caught my eye, with an extremely appauling addition to the Stimulus bill is this. The Democrats are trying to make suffer the ENTIRE STATE OF ILLINOIS’ CITIZENS by now taking control over states. THIS SHOWS HOW VINDICTIVE THE DEMOCRATS ARE, that a light is being shined on how they do business. And Blago not caving to their intimidation and pressures to step down.

    THEY ARE IGNORING our Constitution, AGAIN. And making citizens, countless folks hurt, because they want to punish Blago? ARE THEY FOR REAL?

    This should bring an excellent suit against the Federal Government and Blago better get started. They are further proving his point about what this is all about.

    January 27th, 2009
    Stimulus bill writes out Blagojevich
    Posted: 03:14 PM ET

    (CNN) — The $825 billion stimulus bill the Obama administration is trying to push through Congress would prevent any money given to the state of Illinois from being handled by the state’s impeached governor, Rod Blagojevich.

    The 647-page bill bars Illinois agencies from receiving any money unless the Legislature directs how it will be spent, or until “Rod R. Blagojevich no longer holds the office of governor of the state of Illinois.” It does allow local governments to receive money directly from Washington or through the state, if state agencies follow an established formula.

    The provision was added by the House Appropriations Committee last week.

    Blagojevich’s impeachment trial got under way Monday in the Illinois state Senate.
    http://cnnwire.blogs.cnn.com/2009/01/27/stimulus-bill-writes-out-blagojevich/

  • ces

    That’s a hard question to answer.

    /8th Grade Answer

  • barry bums a ciggie

    You know, the fact that this is even up for discussion by our supposed leader just shows me that we’re really in deep doo doo. For real? I saw a clip of looney Pelosi with George S. talking about contraceptives as part of the “stimulus” and my jaw dropped. WHAT??! Can we just work on getting people some jobs please!

    • Ferd Berfle

      Can we just work on getting people some jobs please!

      If they actually got anything done in a timely fashion, the MSM would get bored and go on to the next Paris Hilton faux pas and Congress would be ignored. They want to stretch this out–a lot–and keep the attention focused on little old them.

      • POdVet

        Please! Paris Hilton is way smarter than these jerkoffs! She only has so so looks, no talent at all in anything. Seriously, she can’t sing, can’t act, and judging from her sex tape, can’t even do that very well! Yet she’s managed to make millions with out her families money. She would be much better at handling the economy than anyone Pelosi, Reed or Obama have put the job on.

    • lark

      I hope she gets excommunicated now. The Bishop should make her an example of a Catholic gone wild. Instead of representing Christ as a Catholic she represents faithlessness.

  • beebop

    Last time I was in the drug store, I spotted an empty box sitting in an unrelated section …. do the high rollers really wear rain coats?

    • JustMe

      form what I have seen many high rollers share it around more than normal !! and not just with their wives….

    • I’m a Linda too

      The escorts they’re schtooping INSIST upon it!

  • JustMe

    “from”

  • cynic

    You’d think that conservatives who plan long-term would generally approve of anything that might encourage the increased liberal use of condoms…

  • Sammie

    As others have stated, the funds for family planning/contraceptives didn’t belong in the stimulus package, and should have been added to a different piece of legislation. Pelosi’s answer to Stephanopoulos was awful, and brought forth visions of Chairman Mao. She made it sound like this whole time Democrats really haven’t been supporting reproductive rights for the benefit of women, but rather for the benefit of the state.

    • Ferd Berfle

      Pelosi is in way over her head and has been since she took the gavel. She is as incompetent as the rest of the democratic leadership and perhaps that’s why they wanted That One as POTUS, because HRC was way too brainy for those morons and would have cast a long shadow.

  • DaddysDarlin

    The Republicans are simply trying to point out the outrageous spending that is inside this so-called stimulas package. 746 million dollars for after school snack programs? How is this going to stimulate our economy? I am all for feeding hungry children, but this is not the package to do that with.
    Too much spending and not nearly enough stimulas inducing ideas.
    Why not spend the 746 million on health care for these kids?
    How about putting a large amount into wind energy? Building turbines would cause a lot of jobs and job security, while at the same time helping our economy and our energy needs.
    There is just so much that can be done with these billions and billions of dollars, we cannot afford to waste a penny of this money and that is what Obama is doing, wasting money in a time our country can ill afford it.
    Obama has insured that ACORN (the ones who made up Obamas phoney voter registrations and have currently several lawsuits in states for voter fraud) has access to over 9 billion dollars! Obama is all about paying his friends back, especially those corrupt ones who got him his job, and he is using the stimulas package to do it.
    NO MORE SPENDING ON MEANINGLESS THINGS, NO MORE PAY FOR ACORN, THIS IS A SIMULAS PACKAGE NOT A HAND OUT FOR EVERYONE OF OBAMAS FRIENDS.!!!!!!!!!

    • UKforDems

      Wow your lies started ad $75 million, then grew to $4 billion and are now at $9. Care to source where you get your figures from?

  • Peggy Sue

    DaddysDarlin, I agree that padding this stimulus program with a zillion issues merely increases the public’s distrust of the whole package. I think feeding the poor, offering family planning, information and clinics, helping the elderly, etc., etc. are all worthy projects. But they deserve their own programs, bills and discussions. Tacking them on like ugly stepsisters minimizes their worthiness and the need for serious debate and negotiation to find the best avenues to help citizens that truly need help.

    The numbers make my head spin. I just have this awful feeling we’re going to be pouring tons of money down a rat hole. Without appreciable results.

    • Ferd Berfle

      Indeed. Those lunkheads in Congress need to stick with the basics. Hell, it is hard enough for them to get a single-subject bill correct. They don’t need to load it up with a lot of ill-conceived bs.

  • IndieDogg

    Okay, a duck walks into a motel, specifically the Quiet Qwackers Easy-Rest on Route 99, with his paid-for Daisy for the evening, slaps down a few crackers for a room and heads upstairs.

    Once in the room and getting both comfy and frisk on the (Goose) feather bed, paid-for Daisy takes a condom from her bag and tears it open.

    At which point, the duck says, “Put it on my bill.”

    Daisy replies, “I don’t think that’ll work.”

    Let’s just say, the evening deteriorated from that point, to the point that they never even got to a discussion of the use of the duck tape in her bag.

  • Oisafraud

    Please keep a record…. Anyone who would vote for Obama’s Economic Stimulus MUST be vote out of office in the next election. PROTO

  • IndieDogg

    [Typo fixed]

    Okay, a duck walks into a motel, specifically the Quiet Qwackers Easy-Rest on Route 99, with his paid-for Daisy for the evening, slaps down a few crackers for a room and heads upstairs.

    Once in the room and getting both comfy and frisky on the (Goose) feather bed, paid-for Daisy takes a condom from her bag and tears it open.

    At which point, the duck says, “Put it on my bill.”

    Daisy replies, “I don’t think that’ll work.”

    Let’s just say, the evening deteriorated from that point, to the point that they never even got to a discussion of the use of the duck tape in her bag.

  • wodiej

    If they want to promote safe sex, how about some programs for abstinence? After all, abstinence doesn’t cost a thing to anyone.

  • Zeke

    Rucy,
    Choo got sum splainin’ to do…
    Man up and fucking do it.

  • beachnan

    Thanks for the hearty laugh–it was ah…so stimulating?!!

  • elise

    Comment from my husband: I support contraceptive stimilus as a way to MAXIMIZE LONG TERM results.

    Note: Elise neither agrees with or endorses the opinions of anyone other than herself.

  • Hank

    Props to Larry for making this funny, even though I’m in favor of the actual “condom stimulus”.

  • Judy L. NC

    Has anybody even checked that condoms are still manufactured in the US?

  • Judy L. NC

    Has anybody even checked that condoms are still manufactured in the US? LOL

  • Surfered

    A lot of tax legislation written over the last eight years included favorable treatment for the fishing tackle industry. I always assumed a fishing tackle company headquartered in the district of the Representative writing the legislation. Does anyone know if a condom manufacturer is headquartered in Rep. Obey’s Wisconsin district?

  • Zeke

    The Kenyan’s mistake was in not calling the condoms what they really are…
    Democrat Rain Hats

  • mary

    Larry, Larry, Larry, Larry….

    LOVED THE HEADLINE on this Post!!!!!!!!!!!!and, yes, indeed, “condoms are stupid stimulus” for economy…

    P.S. But how wonderfully sublime and SAFE for the WORLD it would have been if Mrs. Bush (Dubya’s mom) had available to herm back in that fateful night of July 6th, 1946, this added stimulus at such time as she had decided to have a lapse into a certain more liberal life-begetting experience…now that would have been a real prolyphactic….for the rest of us and the World!….

  • http://link name

    I have the same.,