RSS Feed for This PostCurrent Article

Noquarterusa.net: The Contest

The response to “Hillary versus Obama: The Book” was so outstanding that it seems a contest to pick the best title for such a tome is in order. It will be sponsored by Willnotmoveon.org (whose battle cry is “Ho! Ho! Ho!”) and its rules will be about as arcane as those that govern the balloting for Major League Baseball’s All-Star teams and/or the Iowa Democratic caucuses.

Listed below is the arbitrarily chosen field of titles from which noquarterusa.net readers will help us select our “Elite Eight” by naming the four titles that they like best. Readers may vote (as they can for the All-star teams–and, come to think of it, in the Iowa caucuses) as many times as they like. A winner will be selected from this smaller list. The author of the best title will win a free, lifetime subscription to noquarterusa.net and immediate induction into Willnotmoveon.org’s Hall of Fame.

And the titles from which you may choose ARE:

Hillary Shrugged

Hillary’s Complaint

Obama and the Art of Media Manipulation

The Obamabots’ Guide to the Galaxy

The Wright Stuff

The Legend of Deeply Hollow

No Country for Old Women

Invasion of the Caucus Snatchers

Take the Misogyny and Run

How Green Was My Candidate

A Man for All Political Leanings

A Smoke-filled Room with a View

Obambi Dick

Hail to the Pimp and his First ‘Ho (submitted by Bernie Mac)

Weathering Slights

As I Lay Spying

Dude Be Not Proud

Axelrod’s Fables

Raging Bullshit

The Silence of the Superdelegates

Obama’s Web

The Highjacker’s Guide to the White House

Pant Suit versus Empty Suit

Swindler’s List

Kill Bill Vol. 3

Sense and Insensitivity

For Whom the Bots Toll

Something Mulatto This Way Comes (as inappropriate as a Bernie Mac joke)

Mutiny on the DNC

Jesse Jackson and the Chocolate Nut Factory

A Time to Kill…The Democratic Party

Grim Fairy Tales

Pinocchio: The Adventures of a Puppet Candidate

Presidencies for Dummies

Faith of My Pflegers

Million Dollar Bambi

Blazing Straddles

La Bouge et le Noir (best foreign entry)

The Souls of Not-so-black Folk

Invasions of the Caucus Snatchers

Everything You Wanted to Know About Sexism but Were Afraid Was True

The Count of Monte “Schizo”

Catch-44 (we’ll be electing our 44th president)

Big Two-faced Liar

Terms of Disenfranchisement

Gone Changin’ with the Wind

War and Race

A Roll Call of Her Own

Field of Schemes

Invasion of the Delegate Snatchers

The Lyin’ King

A Botwork Orange

The Red Badge of Racism

Belittle Women

Barack the Obscure

Origin of the Specious

The Bible (King Obama version)