“Illinois Guv”
By Rabble Rouser Reverend Amy on December 14, 2008 at 8:45 AM in Bamboozling, Barack Obama, Chicago politics, John Edwards, Patrick Fitzgerald, Rod Blagojevich
Okay, you have to admit, there has been some pretty strange stuff happening around IL Gov. Rod Blagojevich, and not just that most everyone can now pronounce his name. The humorist, Andy Borowitz had this take on it 12/9/08 in this satirical piece: Illinois Guv Offers Senate Seat to Arresting Officer, Daring Escape Attempt Caught on Tape
Gov. Blagojevich with BFF, Obama looking all warm and friendly (cough, cough).
In what is being called one of the most daring escape attempts in the history of law enforcement, Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich today offered the U.S. Senate seat vacated by President-elect Barack Obama to the FBI agent who took him into Federal custody this morning.
According to U.S. Attorney Patrick Fitzgerald, the astonishing escape attempt occurred moments after Mr. Blagojevich was handcuffed by the agent, who was wearing a wire and captured the entire expletive-laden offer on tape.
“‘You can be the [bleeping] junior Senator from [bleeping] Illinois if you let me out of these [bleeping] handcuffs,’” Mr. Fitzgerald read from a transcript. “‘And if that mother-[bleeper] Barack Obama tries to [bleep] with me, I’ll [bleep] him up.’”
According to Mr. Fitzgerald, “When I say ‘bleep,’ he didn’t really say ‘bleep’ on the tape,” adding, “I’m going to keep making that joke until one of you [bleepers] laughs at it.”
Gov. Blagojevich has been charged with a laundry list of Federal crimes, including stealing his haircut from the dad on “The Brady Bunch.”
Hey, this is just as likely a scenario as any other I can think of with this guy, this bunch of people.
And while I am doing some satire – the jokes practically write themselves on this whole thing – Chicago politicians and all – there is this “American Voices” from The Onion: Illinois Governor Arrested
Illinois Gov. Rod Blagojevich was arrested Tuesday on corruption charges stemming from an alleged conspiracy to sell or trade the Senate seat left vacant by Barack Obama. What do you think?
Ethan Strouth,
Mailroom Worker
“I was moved by the governor’s heartfelt plea that he be given his f**king money back.”
Denise Simmonds,
Dog Groomer
“I should have never had those ‘Spitzer-Blagojevich 2012′ lawn signs printed up back in February.”
John Edwards,
Lawyer
“How much are Senate seats going for these days? I only paid $75,000 for mine back in ’98.”
Well, even counting for inflation, I’d say John Edwards got quite a deal on his Senate seat!
Hey, you gotta admit – as serious as all of this is – and it most definitely is, it is definitely ripe for some major “jokeificating”…Sometimes, you just has to laugh at the absurdity of it all…
(Release: November 13)
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The Onion is better than CNN in so many ways. I almost fell over when I saw this about a year ago (check the date):
http://www.theonion.com/content/news/terrorist_extremely_annoyed_by
but this is the one I hope comes true:
http://www.theonion.com/content/news/international_con_man_barack_obama
because it would somehow make the whole mess sensible.
No kidding – and it is remarkable how much better the “reporting” is on The Onion!
Thanks for those – I actually did a piece on the Con Man one a while back. It WOULD be funny, if not so damn plausible…
I watched Washington Journal for about 3 minutes this morning or 1.6 percent of its time. A question was asked to the reporters. A very simple straight forward question about the “We” and the “I” in Obama’s first response to the Blagogate issue. The reporters began to defend Obama and avoid answering the question. Why? Why do reporters have to adopt the position of defenders of Obama? Specially now when he has a slew of taxpayer paid staffers hired to work to defend his each and every word. Shouldn’t reporters report and WH staffers be the ones who defend the President?
The U.S. press is useless now.
Right now Meet the Press is playing and Fox News Sunday. I will watch neither. What for? I’ll give them Zero of my time. I rather not be informed than to be completely misinformed.
I was watching George S. this morning, again defending Obama as if every press report in the Tribune and the Sun Times, and Patrick Fitzgerald’s’ complaints and investigations never existed.
Truly, I wonder how they can live with themselves, pretending, like that, in front of the nation.
It’s almost as if they’re removed from reality, truly morphing into the American version of Baghdad Bob.
You just want to reach out to them and tell them to stop it, before it’s too late, and they do irreparable harm to themselves, and their reputations.
They are on TV, on the networks, denying reality, seemingly unaware of it.
There is NO WAY the msm is going to be derailed from their extravagant coverage of this ‘historic’ Inauguration.
Boys and girls, it is no deeper than this.
There is going to be wall-to-wall ad nauseum coverage of the event. Lots of interviews with crying AAs who have trekked to DC to view the event in buses, trains, planes, covered wagons and hitch-hiked. Lots of stories about children enamored with the new president and whatever else they can dredge up. They are determined to recreate the JFK days as much as possible.
The media will not be deterred from this. In fact, the only thing they have going for themselves, profit-wise, is catering to the crowd of chumps who believe they are witnessing history.
Patience, grasshoppers.
And in the meantime, don’t expect the msm to support our quests for truth and unbiased coverage. Ain’t gonna happen. At least for awhile.
This is why I appreciate NQ. For the time being, we are plugging away here in the dark.
But time is 0bama’s enemy.
I see your point is excellent. No questions you are right. It will have to be something dreadful for the MSM to be derailed.
Mimi,
You are spot on, as usual.
I hope you’re right, Mimi. But I thought the same thing about the Plame case. And I’ll I got for Fitzmas was a short, balding, rich guy with a bad foot named after a child’s ride on toy.
Ed Rendell Loses His Mind, Endorses Chris Matthews for PA Senate Run
http://guerillawomentn.blogspot.com/2008/12/ed-rendell-loses-his-mind-endorses.html
……………
I am tired of this New Democratic Party based in Chicago under the Obama way. Next they will be endorsing Keith Olbermann for Obama’s old senate seat.
SO, Tweety gets endorsed for all his help in the primaries and the general election. Isn’t the media/press supposed to be un-beholding to politics or politicians? So, the ‘tingle’ up his leg was the thrill of what he was going to get later?
THE USA IS PRESSLESS….AS OF 2008!
Were Tweety a real journalist, he would not run for office. I guess that tells me all I need to know about him.
You have GOT to be kidding me! Please tell me this is a joke!
I had really liked Rendell. But if he is endorsing Matthews, after all the CRAP he said abt Clinton, it’s making me think that maybe his “mild” sexist comment was not as harmless as we wanted to believe…
Chris Matthews. Are you KIDDING ME???
Sexism Sells — But We’re Not Buying It (Governor Rendell look at the beginning and see who you endorsed!)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g-IrhRSwF9U
Sexism, Misogyny, Women’s History & Hillary Clinton (Gov. Rendell, you were the sanity amid the misogyny/sexism and now you are endorsing it?!? TWEETY=DOES IT, IS IT….???????
)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eseoMOEaFnM&feature=related
…………………….
Yes, it would appear that it is true! My heart has been pierced, the cut is too deep and only leaves me more resolved. The ‘New Chicago based Democratic Party’ is not supportive of women and is REWARDING ‘tweeties’ like Chris Mathews for their misogynistic/sexist behavior.
“No self-respecting woman should wish or work for the success of a party that ignores her.” Susan B. Anthony.”
Ah, yes, all those “men” simply tormented by the visage of Hillary Clinton.
Funny how they’re starting to clump together.
Woman Voter, this is one of the funniest yet tragic things I have seen lately. It appears that there are no boundaries when it comes to ethics and journalism’s marriage to politics. The saddest part is, people will actually vote for him! The question, though, is why Chris? Why not John Mayer or P. Diddy or Sara Bernhardt? All of whom show respect to all women….NOT!
My other Sunday morning comment is: Does anyone think that maybe the Illinois Guv is going to take a fall so Obama can quickly put this to rest while simultaneously having the answer to the guv’s family’s financial problems suddenly solved? After all, there is more than one way to shake this down.
Reverend Amy, thanks for the great post and the laugh!!
Actually, the press has been useless since 2000, but who’s counting?
You already know the reason, you just refuse to believe it. Listen, if I were the powers that be, all I have to do is find reporters that favor a certain political part or candidate and put them reporting the news. They wouldn’t question one iota bias news. Our government is a sham. You know this, thats why you are questioning it. Listen to gut, its telling you.
I’ll still keep my tin foil cap on, thank you very much. How many CIA plants do you think there are in the media, anyway? (No offense, Larry!) It’s time to dust off the 70s film THREE DAYS OF THE CONDOR to get an idea that much of what we see happening today is probably spilling over from the internecine power struggles occurring within the intelligence “community.” Stolen elections . . . primary assassinations . . . phony presidential candidates in the likes of GWB and BO . . . .
That was quite telling when the Governor said if Obama fucks w him, he’ll fuck him up. He must know some pretty juicy stuff on Obama. If Chicago politics are what they say, someone eventually is going to squeal on Obama. I can only imagine how brutal Chicago prisons are. The media not reporting on things reminds me of the mob and ghettos. People see all kinds of stuff but if the person is presumably on your side, you don’t tell.
I believe that is the, “F**k Me? F**k YOU F**k Me!” philosophy – there has GOT to be a reason why Blago, under federal investigation, would talk freely on his phone. I mean, c’mon. Despite their attempts to paint him as insane (now, of course), there HAS to be a reason on his part to do so…
Obama Threatens to ‘Bring a Gun’: What If McCain Had Done Same?
http://newsbusters.org/blogs/mark-finkelstein/2008/06/14/obama-threatens-bring-gun-what-if-mccain-had-done-same
……….
News Busters seems to be doing more reporting they days than the ‘REAL PRESS’.
I’m going to make an attempt to watch ‘Face the Nation’ at 10:30.
Place your bets. Will I watch more than 5 minutes or less?
3 minutes.
I watched the interviews with public officials but I could not watch his interview with a reporter. The reporter started ascribing to Obama all kinds of characteristics as if Obama has proven to possess them when in fact Obama has never proven to possess any except ascribe to himself that he possess them and campaign that he will be subscribing to them during his administration. Turned it off. Worthless program if you want to know my opinion. Scheifer himself ascribed to Obama a few qualities he assumes Obama has but we know he doesn’t and promotes Obama’s character as if they were factual when they are constructs of their imaginations.
I can see a new TV reality show coming up. Something akin to Survivor. First we shine the light on local politics and the final would be the White House.
Harp I have an idea for a reality show and I place no copyrights on it on my part. Lets get 10 contestants to run for a fake pseudo-presidential office by allowing them to make 5 min speeches each and then allow each other to undermine their opponents by having them allied with each other and accuse each other for their lies. I’d watch that.
Which ones go to jail in this reality show?
Nice script for the last episode.
LMAO
Whilst watching “It’s a Wonderful Life” on NBC, yesterday, I saw promos for a Ryan Seacrest reality show called “Mama’s Boys,” exactly what it sounds like, mama’s boys looking for love, unable to get out from under the thumb of their mom.
I was thinking perhaps a show called “Out of the Closet” could be next up, where ostensibly straight men can resolve both their sexuality and mama issues, all in one shot.
It’s the natural progression, isn’t it?
So Fitzmas DELAYED the CHICAGO TRIBUNE from reporting the Blago story for 2 months, just enough time to gift BO the election!
Just heard that on Reliable Sources. 2 months brings us back to mid-October. If the story had been reported then, BO would have been so tainted by the investigation he would have lost.
Looks like Fitz drank the koolaid after all.
That should be enough to impeach Fitzgerald and to vindicate Blago. Who’s more corrupt, Fitz or Blago? Give me a break. And why did the Tribune complied? If they legally had to, because an obstruction of justice issue, then we know Fitzgerald was acting politically motivated. But the press is not tied to the justice system at all. The Tribune colluded to repress info valuable to voters.
In October all Fitz had on Glavo was the info from Rezko and Levine. October 26th is when the first bugs and wiretaps took effect, incriminating parties in their own words. Had the Trib released the info, who would have spoken in any form with Glavo?
Fitz went for the gold and got more than expected from it.
Also how much traction would all of this have had Obama lost the election versus the traction it is taking on now?
I was just thinking along those lines this morning. Fitz may have delayed until after the election simply because he knew he get even more over the top crime out of these power hungry, money grubbing criminals. I was wondering if Fitz was corrupt, but now I am thinking he wants to finally get the big dog. At least that is what I hope. Take Obama down and many players go with him.
No need to dump on Fitzgerald. Expanding to the bigger picture is required here.
With the possibility of what Fitz has on Obama, he has effectively brought Obama down to a more realistic level. Obama will need to act more carefully on everything. Common sense tells you that Obama already has one foot in the prison cell.
As Fitzgerald indicated, it’s the tip of the iceberg…patience.
McCain Palin need to sue the Tribune and take their case to the Supreme Court. This needs to be vetted.
Is there a source to prove this?
I heard it this morning on Reliable Sources.
The transcript should be up soon.
Kurtz was interviewing Lyn Sweet and 3 other Tribune editors/reporters.
That’s what was said – Fitz asked the Trib not to release the info 2 months ago.
And all the reporteers were so friggin full of themselves and their role in ’serving justice.’ BARF!
Check the transcript when it’s available.
I’ll keep an eye out for it and post it when i see it.
The mugshot of That One makes him look like a white Alfalfa. Which part is the guv playing in the newest incarnation of Our Gang?
I’ve got a great pic up of Blago on the can…and lots of joke stuff is now selling on eBay…Money to be made, the circus is in town!!!!
The pic is priceless!!!!
The Past Week: December 7-13, Recaps and Random Thoughts (Blago in the Can and ON the Can; Obama License Plates in IL?; Reality-Based Black Commentary; Canada & the Auto Bailout; Live Blog of The History Channel on “Crash: The Next Great Depression?”–No Surprise, A Waste of Time; Ignored Science)
http://tinyurl.com/5ak3zn
I say congrats to Obama. This “scandal” did exactly what it was supposed to do. It distracted away from his COLB issue. So now the courts can just continue to delay untill Obama is sworn into office and voila, only congress can do anything about it after that. Congrats Obama.
YUP!
So what is the current status of the BC issue?
Sometimes you just have to laugh–it beats screaming.
MARK MY WORDS:
Patrick Fitzgerald the “Hero” for going after Scooter Libby is about to become Fitzgerald the Bumbler for going after Obama.
Jim Lehrer, on Friday’s show asked “Whats the big deal anyway?
On ABC with George this morning, the “Round Table” all agreed the Gov. was crass and Dumb But–
When asked what law he actually broke they all hedged with Jibberish answering questions not asked.
Fitzgerald has had a Mike Nifong moment with the usual press hysteria and rush to judgment.
But because it involves Obama, they are sobering up quicker and coming to their sences.
In truth, Fitz has got “Dick”, Zero, Notto.
He moved to fast with a lot of “fluff” and blew it.
The wagons circle and Fitsgerald may find himself on the outside looking in.
Wait for it.
How do like Obama camp not put the story out that the Gov is crazy so anything he says is not true about Obama because he is crazy and once again the MSM is helping him.
This does have a funny side to it, made all the funnier by Blago’s bizarre hairdo and potty mouth. Obama’s ineptitude and the falsity of his change mantra are evident, though. When it comes to an issue of national security, there’s no way we are still going to be finding the humorous side.
I pity Hillary. She’s the only adult on the playground. And now she’s got that nasty Susan Rice stomping around demanding additional staff.
I’m normally an optimist but this election and the MSM have thrown me over to the pessimistic side. I do not see any reason to ‘hope’ like the Obots want us to. Not much is funny when your outlook is bleak. Sorry to be the wet rag.
the media propelled obamba into presidency for a reason. a lot of the media are failing and they need help. i suspect some kind of “chicago style political deal” was hammered out by the obamba campaign. the media will protect obamba all the way to their payday or should i say kickbacks.
i would love to have had more stories to destroy obama before the election.
but Fitzgerald’s job is to follow the crime, not worry about the election.
he acted now because, if you read between the lines, Blago was about to “sell” the Senate seat to Jesse Jackson Jr. that is the most inflamatory part of the story.
also, Rezko talked, which they needed to add to the investigation.
l’affaire Blago is multi faceted, the Senate seat, the Chicago Tribune, Children’s Memorial Hospital, the racing and casino industry. it could be that some of this came from Rezko. it certainly is not the thread that we assumed would come out on Blago…..contributions for certain boards and jobs.
this is new stuff. and the selling of an office is big. and just came out now.
the Tribune only thing would not have included talk on tape from Obama people.
now it does. in some ways, it’s so much better, and worse.