Michelle is NOT “arm candy.” She …

(coughing, sputtering) … Michelle will … (gasping) … she will … (choking) … Michelle will … (reaching for phone) … Michelle … (fingers trailing off phone before 911 can be dialed) … Meeeee … (lapsing into unconsciousness, seeing a white light surrounding Hillary dressed in a tasteful cream-colored suit at an official tea with both feet on the floor as prescribed by every etiquette and job seekers’ guide) …

Your opinions are sought in two polls below, and there are TWO UPDATES:
Which colleges did this yokel go to? Anybody? You are so correct! What percentage of body mass does “white guilt” occupy in this guy, do you think? REALLY? That much? Of course, CNN chose his IReport for publication! It’s so touching, and, um, uh, forward-looking.

Rep. Paul Ryan, get goin’, guy. You’re real presidential timber with the brains and the actual experience!

After all, the American people always choose a person of substance over a symbol. Right?

Will Michelle run for president in 2016 and/or 2020?

• Yes
• No
• Of course, you ninny, because the media wish it to be so
• I'm psychologically incapable of dealing with this question

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Would Michelle win in 2016 and/or 2020?

• Yes
• No
• Are you kidding? The American people will have been deprogrammed by her husband's disastrous presidency.
• Of course she will because the white males of media will make pronounce THIS the time for a female president.

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There are hundreds of resources on the Internet, and countless books and seminar tapes, that advise that one — during a job interview or in any formal setting outside one’s own home — never cross one’s legs. The feet are to be flat on the floor with the legs comfortable resting together.

See the person on the right for how to do it. Do not follow the example of the person to your left:

Photo: Daily Mail

This photograph was sent by a fellow NoQuarter writer who asked, “Does she have to show so much of her thigh?”

The rise of the skirt and the surely unintended display of the thighs is one of the reasons why all experts advise that one does not cross one’s legs in any public setting outside the home.

By the way, don’t you think that the dress worn by the person to your left looks quite suitable for an early evening cocktail party? And don’t you find that the Dior ensemble worn by the person to your right is “quiet” — i.e., it does not call attention to itself? And should not all clothing worn in both formal and professional settings be “quiet,” and not intended to cause the eye to rivet to the clothing but instead to the person?

Here are but a very few of the experts on how to sit properly. They were randomly chosen. You can find hundreds more via Google’s search engine.

“BODY TALK,” by Carol Kinsey Goman, Ph.D, NonVerbalAdvantage.com:

Don’t Cross Legs:

While some people may think that crossing legs shows that you are comfortable and relaxed, this is not the time or place for crossing legs. Crossing legs is seen as especially inappropriate for women as well. Keep both feet on the floor and refrain from shifting leg positions. You will have plenty of time to stretch and cross your legs when the interview is over and you’re behind your own desk.

“Interview Body Language That Sends the Right Message“:

Be aware of the interview body language message your legs are giving. A lot of leg movement is both distracting and indicates nervousness. Resting one leg or ankle on top of your other knee makes you look too casual and comes across as arrogant. Crossing your legs high up conveys a defensive attitude in the one-on-one context of a job interview. Crossing them at the ankles or placing both feet flat on the floor conveys a confident and professional look during the job interview.

“How One Should Sit During The Job Interview?“:

• Crossing your legs at the thighs: Too familiar, especially at the beginning of an interview.
• Leaning forward too much: May make some interviewers feel uncomfortable, especially if you’re physically big and talk loudly.
Tips on good sitting practice include:
• Straight and upright body: This is a neutral sitting position that interviewers expect to see.

“Proper attire and etiquette for men and women“:

Wear a Suit – Although women have come a long way in the world of work, skirt suits are still preferred. There is an old saying “Dress the position you want, not the one you have.” Many corporate offices follow the professional look their customers are accustomed to working with and placing confidence in. Longstanding colors such as Blue, Black, Gray, or Brown are the color choice of many executive champions.

The trick is to look conservative and professional. Wear an appropriate length skirt, avoid tight skirts and mini-skirts. Let quality of your suit, followed by the strength of your words to impress your potential employer.

Blouses – A cotton or silk blouse in a neutral color with a simple collar is fine. Do not wear a sleeve-less blouse, just in case you have to take off your jacket. Most conservative offices do not allow sleeveless blouses as proper dress attire. Be sure, to ask about the corporate culture of an office prior rushing out to the interview. With the rise and fall of dot.com companies, much has changed. Make sure your power blouse should fit comfortably, and not appear to be tight, wrinkled or distracting due to loud colors.

In this photo, Secretary of State Hillary Clinton provides a perfect example of both attire and the positioning of one’s feet and legs:

As for the United States of America’s president? Well, perhaps he can sit like that at Camp David while he watches his beloved sports games. But at a formal tea service? Oh my.

See also, this book’s section: Global business etiquette By Jeanette S. Martin, Lillian H. Chaney

Special thanks to G. and P. for the photographs. And thanks to G. for the video update below.

UPDATE: Here’s the title of the EUX.TV video: “Is Michelle Obama pregnant?” My goodness.

And that bow! Isn’t that something?!

This video, which I do not believe we saw on American TV, comes from EUX.TV, which is “an independent webtv channel that reports on European affairs and EU politics.”

EUX.TV is headquartered in Brussels, Belgium.

Here is the accompanying text:

After the G20 in London, the NATO meeting on the French-German border, the Obama’s travelled to the Czech Republic for an official EU-US summit.

Obama and his wife Michelle listen to a Czech band at the presidential palace in the Czech capital Prague. Obama is in Prague for a summit with the European Union later on Sunday. The Czech republic currently holds the rotating EU presidency.

YES! The EUX.TV page is titled, “Is Michelle Obama pregnant?”

Update #2: Just in case EUX.TV stops by, we want them to know that Michelle’s stomach looked the same on January 20, 2009: