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Only For Hicks: An Open Thread

By SusanUnPC on April 17, 2008 at 1:20 PM in ABC News, Barack Obama, Hillary Clinton, Pennsylvania

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Below are some stories that you hicks won’t be reading …

… except for laughs and giggles:

Billary Redux / D—y K-s: “Keep turning up the HEAT on ABC… New Info”

Now, so you don’t have to click on the link to the Orange Place — and we don’t want to drive up their plummenting hits (down 50% in the last month, I hear) — here’s commentary on that diary:

“Nutroots go ballistic: We demand a stultifyingly dull debate! Or else!” — by The Other Michelle (Malkin) (however, at times it strikes me that the two Michelles seem similar in personality type)

Read more “renting-of-garments” stories via this link at Memeorandum.com.

COMING SOON: More commentary on the debate, including a hysterical David Corn on the morning conference call hosted by Hillary Clinton’s communications director Howard Wolfson.

P.S. On MSNBC last night, Wolfson looked like the cat who swallowed the canary.

  • http://Supergram.blogspot.com Melissa

    STOP STOP my ribs are hurting!!! I haven’t had this much fun in months!!!!!
    The boyz are running scared now!
    oh look, see barack, see him RUN! See Obamaniacs explode. Run, Barry, Run!

    • workingclass artist

      OK….THIS IS TOO FUNNY….. What’s weird is that my grandmother (maternal) is a bona-fied HATFIELD…and I yam a lil’ bitter that you used them McCoys as yer pictur…..Anywayz..I salute you…BANJO UP!…LOL

  • http://noratings.blogspot.com/ Bud White

    Please match me with a $5 contribution
    to Hillary’s campaign!!!!!!

    http://www.hillaryclinton.com/contribute/GSYS

    • PMS

      Double or nothin’. Damn, I’m still bitter, so double it is!

      P.S. It’s hard to use these internets with my gun in one hand and my Bible in the other.

    • Suziq

      Bud – I just gave $20 to Hillary!

      Contribution Details
      Date: April 17, 2008 1:46 PM EDT
      Contact: Suziq
      Westfield, NJ 07090
      Amount: $20.00

    • ddh312

      Me too!

      Contribution Details
      Date: April 17, 2008 5:44 PM EDT
      Contact: ddh312
      Los Angeles, CA 90066
      Amount: $20.00

      Thanks to Bud for the idea/challenge :-)

  • Nag

    Hey I herd dat guy Kos was not only crashing the gate, now’s he’s Smashing the Party:
    http://tinyurl.com/6phyjs

  • apishapa

    At the end of the debate, Hillary had this huge, happy to be there kind of smile, then came Barack and his sourpuss.

  • orionATL

    susan -

    you would do well to can this, pronto.

    this is not a criticsm, just a judgement.

    • simon, too

      Why?

      Have they tried to set up Clinton?

      I think, from Barry’s POV, it might help explain why people took offense to his remark.

      He doesn’t understand “those people” are his intellectual equals, or even superiors, he can’t even understand WHY others don’t respect his Harvard degree as evidence of his intellectual superiority…

      This very situation Barry created is a clue, but, being so narcissistic, and untalented, they miss that, too.

      We are a nation of equals. Barry, while inaccurately fancying himself as superior, insulted the majority of it’s people, where is the disconnect?

    • Hope

      Orion

      Why? What happened to free speech? She shouldn’t have to take any post off PERIOD! Go tell someone else to take off their posts over at Huffington or Kos or wherever else.

    • workingclass artist

      Susan Hatfields approve….I needed a laugh…..Don’t know bout them McCoyz tho…..

  • http://noquarterusa.net/ SusanUnPC

    Here’s another great one, by Taylor Marsh (she posted it at Huffington Post as well):

    “Just How Soft has Obama’s Coverage Been?“

  • http://hyper-educated-uppity-woman.blogspot.com Uppity

    I’m dying here!

  • http://hyper-educated-uppity-woman.blogspot.com Uppity

    Flea, if we get married, can we still be brother and sister?

    • http://noquarterusa.net/ SusanUnPC

      Oh gawd almighty.

      (Ah thut youze was gest cuzins.)

    • beebop

      ain’t you cousins? or is yer mommas cousins?

      • Hope

        My mammie and pappie look alike? Hows come?

        • workingclass artist

          Hmmmm….. Cuz……Yer famly tree don’t fork

    • http://www.food4humanity.org HoosierHoops

      I know a nice little compound down in Texas..that way we can all get married.
      yee-ha
      ( uppity..I have a comment on your blog awaiting moderation )

    • Fleaflicker

      Sure. I’m as pervy as the next guy.

    • Northwest rain

      Thanks — for one of the BEST comments. I’m still laughing!!!

      Flea & Uppity sitting in a tree . . . .

  • Nag

    OMG! I just followed your link to that diary. They are shrill, they are scared. A few tiny little questions and they are tripping over themselves with the hand-wringing. They should be THANKING ABC… if Obama takes the nomination, SOMEONE has to prepare him for the nastiness sure to come.

  • http://noratings.blogspot.com/ Bud White

    Let the Obamacans drink Lattes — Give $5
    to Hillary Today!!!!

    http://www.hillaryclinton.com/contribute/GSYS

    • Hope

      I been panhandlin here in Hoakey Valley. Cuz of my whiskey breath I ain’t doin so good. Can’t get the five buckaroonies! Need summ HELP!!

    • pm317

      here you go, Bud!

      Contribution Details
      Date: April 17, 2008 2:55 PM EDT
      Contact: removed
      Amount: $10.00

  • Fleaflicker

    This is just TOO Funny! Thank you for the comic relief!

  • raymo

    But I cain’t read Ma! Sumbudy gonna has tah read it to me!

    Wait! I do believe I hear our theme song!

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=esl2NNOtHQE

    (it sure ain’t Born To Run anymore!)

  • Mel

    I went and gone fishin up dare in Barry country today, and dang it, I didn’t even need no fishin pole, all dem dare fishies where just a floatin on top of the pond.

    An it was dang hot, so I went and sat me near some big ole buildin in the shade to keep my fishies from gettin sun burn.

    And ya’ll know sumtin, dem dare fishies were a glowin so brightly,n I saw me a sign I could read on dat buildin, said Ex el on, now dat some gas place or sumptin?

    Den sum guys began yellin at me, so I grabbed me fishies and ran home. Dem dare guys had all sortsa guns an stuff, but me now safe!

    Sushi anyone?

  • Untilthelastdogdies

    Yessiree…sumbuddy best ask that other fella from New Jersey, Jon BonJovi what he thinks of all this here mess!!!

  • orionATL

    hope (14:02)-

    i understand.

    it’s just that i’m a little nervous about this kind of humor right now.

    it’s a missile that can sometimes go off course.

    • http://noquarterusa.net/ SusanUnPC

      For me, it’s all about comic relief. I’m not too worried about anyone reading something deep into this. It’s humor. Plain and simple.

    • workingclass artist

      I come from Hatfields (AUTHENTIK HILLBILLIES ON MY MOMMA’S SIDE ) AND IN SUM QURTERZ WE IS ROYALTIE…. It’s OK….Just fun.

      • ChrisXP

        I come from Hatfields (AUTHENTIK HILLBILLIES ON MY MOMMA’S SIDE ) AND IN SUM QURTERZ WE IS ROYALTIE…. It’s OK….Just fun.

        Well, sis’s friend was born in a literal log cabin in rural Georgia, before 1930. He didn’t get as far as 3rd grade, because the farming had to be done. My mom would be considered a hick in American terms, as she was born on a farm in Japan, where her dad was lucky enough to have enough acres to not only grow food to feed his village, boats for fishing (that is until WWII when the army stole everything).

        But even he nor even my mom doesn’t speak like the above photo!

        Come to think of it, the only time I hear “ya’ll” is on TV or from some visiting tar heel from NC. The one good thing I appreciate living where I do is folks take pride in speaking passing English, even if they never graduated from the 7th grade.

        That guy didn’t do too bad. Had a factory job for over 30 years; retired; has his home that’s paid for; his favorite truck (which too many want as it’s a 70s Chevy and maintained well); and happy as a clam over his grandson. Mom didn’t do much worse.

        People make fun of rednecks so much, but from the experience in knowing and living in rural Georgia, they’re some of the hardest working folks I know. They’re up at 4am; at work before sunrise; come home late; the single guys like their hard liquor; married guys have a clan to upkeep. But I wouldn’t trade those days living out in the sticks with these guys as neighbors, for a penthouse in NYC. They’re there when the country calls; they’re there when a tornado or storm hits with chainsaws and their pick ‘em up trucks (often before the EMS gets there) to keep roads open and get injured to the hospitals; with their CBs they also help out along the road where even tow trucks won’t go (12am and your fishing boat trailer is stuck on the ramp — think ABC towing is going to come out in the middle of nowhere to get you or your vehicle out???); they’re there to donate goods for relief work (be it locally; regionally; or nationally); and they’re there to check up on widows and divorcees to make sure they’re safe. In the rural areas where police are few and far between, they’re the law folks depend on (and damn straight they’re armed to the eyebrows — ever had to fend off packs of rabid wild dogs, before????) — and when cops are short handed, have to depend on to catch criminals. This I know directly, when my dad was a sheriff.

        Remember decades ago when 4 young kids of the same family drowned at a local swimming hole. The whole town heard about it (dad’s police radio was nothing more than a CB, as he was also the fire chief; and ambulance driver and needed the help), and they raced to the bridge to help find them before the creek would carry them to the river. When the bodies were brought back on trucks to the town’s store, you couldn’t hear a pin drop, as everyone stood transfixed in awe. Biggest funeral I ever saw.

        In a city? It would be a yesterday’s news inbetween the sports news and weather, with the manners to go with it.

        Went to school there for awhile, and the biggest difference from the city school I transfered to latter was, they said their prayers before school breakfast and lunch (where I learned the Lord’s Prayer even, and no ACLU BS either); and when you had your kindergarden graduation (yes, they treated education as a special event), every girl and boy knew manners — from how to courtesy and bow like ladies and gentlemen, so needed when you were handed your first of first diplomas.

        Today, brainy kids will spit and bite you like those rabid dogs, and about as stupid of practical life, too.

        Education doesn’t mean a hill of beans, when it trades a sense of community for a degree. That community is what those hicks prefer, than being some stuck up rocket scientist, who believes in fences and locked doors.

        So much of the wrong things are known. Folks see what they want to see, hardly the truth.

  • orionATL

    Susan -

    i greatly admire your work here.

    i’m just a natural worrier.

  • Mel

    gotzes me a question about dat debate last evenin!

    Did I hear Barry say he was raised by a single momma?

    Now was dat a suggestun dat he ain’t from a gay family or sumptin, dat he is a normal folk?

    Just askin cuz he sure do spend a tonna time out dare in dat San Francisco place dare!

    a nudder ting dat boddered me last night durin dat debate, was I watchin a magic show, I kep seein Barrys big ole ears disappearin all da time!

    An how come dat Barry was ummin and uhhin an studderin so much last night, did dat guy have one of dem phones buzzin in his pants pocket agin causin dat?

    • Fleaflicker

      You made a funny.

  • Fleaflicker

    One of the best songs EVER!

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VBsbCMIyG6E

    • Untilthelastdogdies

      God yes!

      Takes me back to those Houses Of The Holy days (nights) spent sitting around
      in the dark listening to the greatness!

      Thanks.

  • glennmcgahee

    As a good ole Tennessee boy here, I can appreciate the humor and its good to see some relatives get in on the action. We don’t know how to push all them button you know. But , I git it. I’m in Florida now, but just had relatives here from home. They hate Obama about as much as they hate Bush, and alot of em voted for Bush, TWICE!
    They remember the Clinton years well and realize that finacially, they felt more secure knowing somebody in the White House was from around these parts. Appalachia is poor. America has no idea how poor these people are. The South side of Chicago is far away and all we hear from that area is gun violence with the kids. Tell me again what Obama organized there? I don’t beleive anybody has said.

    • jes

      I believe he organized churches or something to do with churches.

  • Fred C. Dobbs

    Ah, Sue…you went and Bogarted a pic of the Road Company of Deliverance.

    Or, was this a Faculty shot for the University of Georgia?

    • workingclass artist

      I think them’s McCoys mis- identifyed as Hatfields…..I don’t rekonyz an of my kin….Granny was a Hatfield. Culd be wrong but then agin culd be right.

  • Catriley

    Of course once I read that this thread was for hicks, I had to click on it — My self esteem is starting to crumble after being called an ‘uneducated, low class, racist’ because I support Hillary.

    Okay, I just read that the crowd was “heckling” the debate hosts? WTF? Obama needs to rein his followers — they are becoming a mob.

    You don’t freakin’ scream and heckle at a political debate. The red bull crowd is turning America into one of those places where the politicians smack each other with shoes and shit.

    I think the Obamacrat thugs are incredibly dumb. Hmmm.. let’s see. If the media is largely responsible for framing the way the public sees a candidate, do you REALLY think it’s wise to heckle and nastygram them when you don’t get your way?

    Most of the active Hillary supporters I know have sent emails of disappointment to the media, but I can’t recall any of us going on full-scale attack mode, as these guys have.

    • http://noquarterusa.net/ SusanUnPC

      At least you’re not a “typical white person” like me.

      P.S. Well, maybe you are but you just don’t realize it.

  • http://thatsmeontheleft.blogspot.com/ Puget Sound Island Girl

    Hey—somewhere in my family history are some of those crazy Hatfields. They weren’t into whining—what a big baby Obama is!

    • workingclass artist

      Why…We culd be related like cuzins or somethin….Our branch got tired of the fued and went to Illinois…..

  • J.Foreman

    I have been looking at the comments. Obama supporters are goin ape. Thanks to ABC for a real debate and getting answers from Obama, well kinda. I can’t wait till the next one. Of course, there was nothing wrong with the debate at all, Obama was asked questions and oh my goodness. How dare anyone ask Obama a question.

  • Fred C. Dobbs

    ADDDENDUM:

    I plan to spend this evening watching my VHS of A Face in the Crowd, which hasn’t been played in about 6 years or so…

    Thanks for the Inspiration!

    “Chicken-eatin’, Bible-readin’, just plain folks!”

    • workingclass artist

      OH BROTHER WHERE ART THOU is good too…

  • http://www.food4humanity.org HoosierHoops

    From the IndyStar:
    Cameron Huffman, 19, a student at Indiana University-Kokomo, was also a witness. He was walking his girlfriend to his car when he heard the noise. He looked up in the sky but it was several seconds before any object appeared.

    “It was really interesting,” said Huffman, who believes he saw a meteor. “People just started flooding the radio stations and the police. It woke everybody up.”

    That wasn’t a meteor.. that was Obama’s campaign blowing up over Indiana.

    • workingclass artist

      LOL…that was good.

  • JoeySky

    Susan, “the cat who swallowed the canary” is really a good line. very funny.

  • Paul

    Obama: I Am A Pretty Darned Good Politician

    Must watch video shows OBama’s arrogance. Reminds me of Bush infact Hitler.

    http://embeds.blogs.foxnews.com/2008/04/16/obama-i-am-pretty-darned-good-politician/

  • http://www.madinthemiddle.blogspot.com churl

    How’d you get my family album ?

    • pm317

      I love that picture.

  • blobert

    Good news to hear Orange Hate is on the skids.
    How many times can you read over-written spam?

  • Amalia

    ok, these are my people too, but you know
    the orange people are gonna misuse what is
    here in humor at their expense. they are so
    freaked today, zapping out all they do not
    know.

    between the HuffingtonPost blogger outing
    Obama as an elitist, the debate last
    night, and the FauxBrit vid on this site I am
    mightily amused and so happy to have
    this site to visit!

  • Flineo

    OMG – Susan, yo’r jist 2 dam much LOL

  • buckskin711

    reminds me of that song……a country boy can survive…you know i got a shot-gun rifle and a 4-wheel drive and i can run a trout-line and a country boy can survive……yes he can ! and then obama reminds me of on the south side of chicago, bad bad leroy brown {not}.meaner than a junk-yard dog {not} come on up here to my mountains and see a real “hick-gate”. he’s suck a jack-ass