Obama Orders Faithful To “Be Nice To Clinton Supporters”
By Uppity Woman on May 19, 2008 at 9:36 AM in Barack Obama, Current Affairs, Disenfranchisement, Florida, Hillary Clinton, Hoodwinking, Kentucky, Messiah, Michelle Obama, Michigan

Ok everybody, line up!
Barack Obama has ordered his faithful to “be nice to Clinton supporters“!!! Are you not excited about this??? Everybody can line up and fall into place now and join the Hope-y Change-y Train! We know from past experience that he’s an honest and sincere man who never lies and isn’t a bigot, so let’s get with the program! There’s no reason why we shouldn’t trust him, right? Right?
Seriously, what is it with this clown? Is it that he just doesn’t get it — or is it that he gets it but enjoys pretending that he doesn’t get it? Does he have a missing comprehension gene or something? Is he a member of DENSE-A? What?
How delusional is it for Barack Obama to imagine that all it takes to whip those girls and hicks and other useless people into shape is to make Nicey-Nicey, now that he needs us? Do you think maybe somebody counted up those beans and said, “Whoa Barry! You’ve got a problem! We just added up all the African Americans, College Professors, College Students, Old Hippies Still on The Bong and terrorists who aren’t in jail—and um….Barry? Even if they all vote twice which is possible if the Mayor of Gary IN does the counting, you’re in trouble, man! You better go do Nicey- Nicey right now!”
How funny is this guy? He and his surrogates have insulted millions of Women, Jews, Gays and Lesbians, Italians, Blue Collar workers, Democrats Who Prefer Democracy to Marxism, “Bitter Hicks,” Seniors, everybody in Michigan and everybody in Florida. And that’s the short list. Yet, he somehow fantasizes that he can wave his Hopey Changey Magic Eraser or something, and they will not only forget, but they will just fall at his feet once he declares himself The President.
Is this just plain surreal or what? Here’s the most frightening part of what might be headed our way, fellow bitches: I read somewhere, or maybe I saw it on one of those hallucinating news channels, that Barry should use Michelle to reach women. Think about that for a second, sisters.
Michelle is going to reach out and just….well….heal our female souls. After all, we all want to be just like Michelle, don’t we? Just listening to her bitch and moan about how we should just give them the Presidency hard it is to run for President, and watching her exude that contagiously endearing Gospel Of Misery should cure us, don’t you think?. Between Michelle and Barry, do you not imagine that these two arrogant snobs in the White House would constitute the most depressing and out-of-touch Presidency in your lifetime, George Bush only possibly notwithstanding?
But wait! There’s more! So that we might start heeling “healing” faster, and as if we hadn’t already thought we’ve seen Barack Obama reach the pinnacle of Audacity Of Arrogance, he is also planning to officially declare himself the Democratic nominee on Tuesday, May 20. That’s right. On May 20, Barack Obama is going to throw a big huge “victory” bash and say Look! I just got my butt handed to me on a plate in Kentucky. I’m the Winner! I’m the Winner!
Well, of course he can declare himself The Winner! You could declare yourself the winner too if you made sure that two swing states’ votes were not counted, and then make damned sure that neither state was allowed to re-vote. I mean why bother with voters’ rights when you know you are dealing with two states that would kick your a$$ back to Pakistan Chicago if you let them near a voting booth? Why take the chance, when you can just remove two entire states from the primary? I mean it’s not as if you would look like a cheater or anything……
Barack Obama may get away with declaring himself the nominee of 48 states, because who’s going to dare stop him, right? But what I really want to know is what are his campaign people taking? I want some! Has nobody explained to this man-child that in order to become a President, a person has to participate in an actual nominating process? And after that, he has to participate in, you know, a General Election? Did somebody at least tell him it’s not a big caucus and the kids in the buses can’t scare old and disabled people without getting arrested? Did anybody try to at least take him aside and explain that Florida and Michigan voters, and all those other useless people he ticked off, are going to get another chance and that they just might not be in the mood to vote for him–with or without his Nicey-Nicey campaign? Is there some kind of parallel universe happening over at the Obama homestead?
Yes there is! As Obama has stated ad-nauseum, he is “confident” that we will all “come together” for November. And just to help us all “heal,” he is moving ahead with his “Be Nice To Clinton Supporters” program.
I thought you might like to see part of Barry’s actual Healing Program. This is the Bitter Hick portion. Barry is going to convert those goddamned tractor jockeys if it’s the last thing he does:
Here’s Barack Obama’s idea of how to win the hearts and votes of rural people who carry guns and pray. Look at this phony, will you? I mean are you cracking up or what?
I like to call this his Bitter Hick Campaign Poster.
Pat Robertson would kill to have a poster like this one, don’t you think? That’s right, Barack Obama is now running for Pope President Of All Bitter Hicks. I mean, those stupid hicks won’t be suspicious or anything will they? They never saw Reverend Wright on TV or anything, did they?
Ok everybody. Genuflect. I’ll wait.


















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