Of course, the night he showed me, he was pulling brodies in my mom’s car. Trying to force a skid…lol

‘When adding water/coolant to the car, keep it running.’

Now that I think of it most of his advice was tied to cars. But it has served me well over the years and at car dealerships. He thought it was important as a girl to not get taken advantage of at the shop. That knowledge has riled more auto shops than one would expect.

I hope the same works for you when you discover better qualities in yourself and think “Now where did that come from?”

2. If you’re going to smoke and/or drink, use The Good Stuff. Killing your liver with cheap rye and Camels is just tacky.

3. Never drive on New Year’s Eve. Cabbies have to eat, too, and all the Amateur Drinkers will be at the wheel.

4. Keep your car in good repair and waxed. You never know when the opportunity to Trade Up will appear.

5. THE VERY DAY you get laid off or fired from a job, go buy a new car while you still have Credit. The Bank has more patience than your mechanic.

6. Know how to use a butcher’s steel and do so regularly. A man who knows how to deftly carve a turkey or a ham can always find a place to go four times per year.

7. There’s Her Place and there’s Hotels…there is no YOUR Place.

8. If a woman needs Rescuing, refer her to the Coast Guard and move along.

9. If a woman tells you that her children, “need a father,” ask her if they are products of immaculate conception. It’s not YOUR responsibility.

10. Always carry on your person $200 in traveler’s checks and the telephone numbers for AAA, a bail bondsman and a lawyer.

11. Most everyone you meet in a day will be a fool, a liar or someone who wants to scam you. Forewarned is forearmed.

12. In Business, you have no friends, just acquaintances who haven’t figured out how to screw you yet.

13. NEVER loan your Jumper Cables or gas can.

I added, for my daughter:

14. The FIRST two essential pieces of furniture for a single woman’s dwelling place are a Fire Extinguisher and a box of condoms.

Thanks very much for these gems!

As soon as you learn there is always someone bigger, meaner, and smarter than you are, you’ll stay outta trouble!

Grandma was slow, but she was old. (Every Saturday morning for this one.)

Keep your thumb out when you make a fist so you don’t break it when you punch someone. Use your shoulder when you punch. ( And I’m a girl…)

Most people don’t give a rat’s ass about you. They are too busy worrying about themselves.

On your stomach and getting fat: It will stretch a mile before it tears an inch.

Find something to remember each day.

My feet smell and my nose runs. I must be built upside down.

Worry is like a rocking chair. It gives you something to do, but it doesn’t get you anywhere.

Keep your wheels under the car.

Be your own best friend.

And the ever famous: You’ll always be my little girl.

1–Never play poker with a guy named “Doc”.
2–Never eat at a place called “Mom’s”

and my favorite advice to all young men:
3–Never sleep with a woman who has more problems than you have.

Ellen D, I love advice items 1&2, and I hadn’t heard them before.

But as for item 3, that is a waste of time: to a young man, “more problems than you” is part of the attraction:

Sloopy lives in a very bad part of town
and everybody else, tries to put my sloopy down
Sloopy I don’t care, what your daddy do
Cuz you know sloopy, girl, I’m in love with you

and so I say now

Hang on sloopy, sloopy hang on
Hang on sloopy, sloopy hang on

His advice: Never ever trust other people. See for yourself.
Oh yes, and never co-sign a loan for anyone not even family.

He never told me the classic:

Never play poker with a guy named “Doc”.
Never eat at a place called “Mom’s”

and my favorite advice to all young men:
Never sleep with a woman who has more problems than you have.

“Always ask yourself why is this person saying this to me

sounds very much like my family’s “Consider the source”.

I find that being there and participating with the vet provides closure and holding your pet and comforting them sedated and tranquil at peace as we say goodbye is the best way to complete the memory.

Never do anything half-assed, if your going to do something, do it right!

Think for yourself.