Shattered Donkeys
By Pat Racimora on September 16, 2008 at 1:30 AM in Barack Obama, Democratic Nomination, Democratic Party
Has your lack of support for Barack Obama cost you any highly valued friends?
Social psychologists have long pondered the nature of interpersonal relationships, often using diagrams and theories that turn the vibrant concept of “friendship” into bare mathematical equations. But I have always liked my Dad’s simple definition best: “Friends are the people you really look forward to breaking bread with over and over again.”
Of course, people usually bond based on at least one shared interest, but I have never had a friend with whom I was aligned about everything.
So to be treated like a traitor, to be scorned and socially banished by a few of the people I cared about the most, has been heartbreaking.
They cannot understand why I don’t see a great and inspiring leader who would turn our country around within a short time after taking office. I never put it this way to them, but I looked carefully at Obama’s fast rise and see someone who is self-serving first and foremost and who gives a great speech (off a teleprompter–without it, not so much) and whose career has been built on expediency with heavy-handed support from some very bad players.
I’ve lived a long while, and I have always been deeply involved in politics. I have never encountered anything like this, not even with my Republicans friends in 2000 and 2004. We simply decided that “Friendships Trump Politics,” and agreed not to squabble.
Maybe the old saw about how you know someone is a real friend—“Someone who will visit you in the hospital”—is not quite right. Maybe the new version should be “Someone who keeps caring about you even though you disagree about Barack Obama.”


















