What if the 9th Republican Presidential Debate was held on ABC Television using the “Dancing With The Stars” format. Here’s my fantasy transcript:
Cue Theme Music: Harold Wheeler
Tom Bergeron: Welcome back to Dancing with The Stars. During the commercial break both Jon Huntsman and Rick Santorum performed their dances. The judges decided not to give them scores since absolutely nobody cares. Now, it’s Herman Cain dancing the Jive.
Dance
Tom: Herman Cain dancing the jive. Nice hat. How do you think you did?
Herman: I expect a 9-9-9.
Tom: Let’s go to our judges. Head judge Len Goodman.
Len: Well Herman, let’s be honest. The fans keep voting you back, but you should have been gone weeks ago. Your dance is one misstep after another, it’s painful to watch. It’s as if you didn’t practice at all.
Herman: I don’t need to practice. I can hire someone competent to practice for me.
Len: On a positive note, I do like the hat.
Tom: Carrie Ann Inaba
Carrie Ann: Mr. Cain. Please take your hand off my leg.
Tom: Bruno Tonioli
Bruno: Herman you first came on the state stalking like a lithe black panther. Now you are a pussycat. And I don’t like anything that has to do with pussy.
Herman: You don’t know what you’re missing.
Tom: Alright Herman, go upstairs and wait for your scores.
6 6 6. It’s 999 upside down.
Tom: Up next, dancing the Waltz, it’s Texas Governor Rick Perry
DANCE

Tom: Well Governor, you thought you would waltz to the nomination. How do you think that went.
Gov Perry: I nailed it Tom
Tom: Let’s check with the judges. Carrie Ann.
Carrie Ann: Mr. Cain, please remove you hand from my leg.
Tom: Len
Len: Well Governor. The waltz is a basic dance. 1-2-3, 1-2-3, 1-2-3. You kept dancing 1-2, 1-2.
Gov Perry: I kind of forgot 3.
Len: You can’t win this competition unless you can do 3 basic steps.
Tom: Bruno
Bruno: Governor slick Rick. Oh, so many delicious rhymes to go with that, that I can’t use on television. The waltz can be hard. And hard can be good. Very good But it looks to me like you like it easy.
Tom: Ok, Governor head on up for your scores.
4-5-5
Tom: And now dancing next…is former Massachusetts… Michelle Bachman, you were sent home in week 2. What are you doing here.
Michelle: No I wasn’t.
Tom: Yes you were. Voted off in record numbers.
Michelle: Ok, you got me. But this is my husband’s favorite show and god sent me to help cure Bruno .
Bruno: Naughty, naughty Michelle.
Tom: Up next, dancing the Tango, it’s former Massachusetts Governor Mitt Romney.
DANCE
Tom: How did you like that Tango, Mitt?
Mitt: I can do a salsa if you prefer. Maybe a quick step?
Tom: Bruno
Bruno: Mitt, you give me fits. The Tango is a dance of passion. A man with 6 wives should be passionate. It is a hot dance. Yet your performance was as cold as the public reaction to Obama care, which is based on your own plan.
Mitt: I can be more passionate if you want.
Tom: Carrie Ann:
Carrie Ann: Mr. Cain. Please remove your hand from my leg.
Tom: Len
Len: Well Governor. The Tango is an upright, sharp dance. Yet, you were flipping and flopping all over the dance floor. I wasn’t sure if it was a Tango or a tantrum.
Mitt: I can do a tantrum if you like
Len: I’m not sure what you can do at this point.
Tom: Ok, governor. Upstairs for your scores.
6-7-5 Just like Mitt. A little bit of everything
Tom: Our last contestant has been dancing the Hustle for over 25 years. It’s former speaker of the house, Newt Gingrich.
DANCE
Tom: How do you think that went Mr. Speaker.
Newt: The people are smarter than that. I don’t have to answer your leading questions
Tom: Len
Len: Well Mr Speaker, you’ve been hustling a long time and it shows. You know the moves. The thing is, to dance a proper hustle you have to move your fanny just right. And your fanny is all over the place. You talk about other people’s fannies, but turns out yours is just as big a problem. Get your fanny in line and you might have a chance.
Tom: Bruno
Bruno: Fannies and Freddies’. I like it. Did I ever tell you about the week I spent with Freddie Mercury?
Tom: Carrie Ann
Carrie Ann: That’s it, I am filing charges.
Tom: Off for your scores.
7-7-7
Tom: So the Speaker leads the field with a 21. But it’s close. Call in, your votes count. Somebody actually has to win this thing. Join us next week for our next contest. Including a special guest star senior salsa with Bob Dole and John McCain.
Cue Music Lights out.

It’s time to have some fun at the Speaker’s expense. I’ll go first.

Nancy was caught in a web of her lies.
The CIA hopes that she fries.
President Obama we trust
Will toss her under the bus.
And Steny can try on speaker for size.

Ok…one more from me…

For Obama she fixed the great race,
but then her fibs were so out of place.
She was hung out to dry
But we won’t see her cry.
Because her botox locked solid her face.

That’s enough from me. Feel free to add your own.

The Nocturnal Warrior hosts a one hour Blog Talk Radio program for No Quarter Radio every Tuesday night at 9:00 PM Eastern.

Let me start by making this clear, I abhor about 90% of what comes out of Michael Savage’s large mouth. Broadcasting to millions daily over close to 400 radio stations nationwide, Savage pulls no punches as he promotes his never ending campaign for “borders, language and culture” to his loyal audience. He is offensive, crude and incredibly arrogant. He is so far out there on the right, most Republican politicians steer clear of him and he oftens turns his vindictive wrath on them. No one will confuse him with Rush Limbaugh as being the unofficial head of the GOP. He had one brief flirtation with attempting to mainstream and was fired by MSNBC almost as soon as they hired him.

Even so, I stand with him as be gears up his battle to fight the British Home Secretary who added his name to a list of hate mongers not welcome in Britian.

Secretary Jacqui Smith believes that Savage promotes hatred and could incite violence.

Smith said the British government believes the people on the list have views or attitudes that could provoke violence.

“If people have so clearly overstepped the mark in terms of the way not just that they are talking but the sort of attitudes that they are expressing to the extent that we think that this is likely to cause or have the potential to cause violence or inter-community tension in this country, then actually I think the right thing is not to let them into the country in the first place. Not to open the stable door then try to close it later,” she said.

“It’s a privilege to come to this country. There are certain behaviors that mean you forfeit that privilege.”

The others on the list are Jewish nationalist Mike Guzovsky; imprisoned Russian skinhead leaders Artur Ryno and Pavel Skachevsky; and Islamic leaders Wadgy Abd El Hamied Mohamed Ghoneim, Abdullah Qadri Al Ahdal, Safwat Hijazi , Amir Siddique, Abdul Ali Musa, Samir Al Quntar and Nasr Javed.

Said Savage, “How can a nation put me on a list and leave hate preachers in England who say that we’re going to kill all of you? We’re going to convert all of you to Islam. How is it possible that those hate preachers can’t be deported from Britain, but I can be banned from Britain? People who advocate actual murder cannot be deported from Britain.

“How is it that liberalism has gotten so distorted and cowardly?”

How does Michael Savage make it on this list? His show is not even broadcast in England. Most of England is asleep while his show airs live (6:00-9:00 PM EDT.) While certainly available over the internet and by podcast, it’s not like he has a huge audience in the UK. I have been repulsed more than once listening to his program (as a fellow radio host I do admire his fearlessness, use of the language and show preperation as he is exceptionally well read), but have never once heard him incite violence in any way shape or form. In fact his virulent attitude towards illegal immigration, gay marriage and other issues comes back to a firm belief in enforcing existing laws. He actually promotes abiding by the law.

He is a large supporter of the law enforcement community and often rails against those who protect the rights of law breakers which he believes leads to violence against law enforcement officers. Yes, some of those views may be interpreted by some as racist, but he never calls on anyone to enact violent retribution.

So again, how did he end up banned in Britain along with skinheads, Palestinean, Islamic and Israeli extremists? Is someone trying to curry favor with the Obama administraion who Savage lambastes on a regular basis? Are the Obama folks throwing up a trial balloon to see how this plays overseas before trying it out at home?

The good news is, Savage is not taking it lying down and may even use Britain’s strict anti-defamtion laws in his defense. He also has not lost his sense of humor.

“Darn! And I was just planning a trip to England for their superior dental work and cuisine,” he recalled thinking.

“Then it sank in,” he told WND, “and I said, ‘She said this is the kind of behavior we won’t tolerate? She’s linking me with mass murderers who are in prison for killing Jewish children on buses? For my speech? The country where the Magna Carta was created?’”

Savage said he wants top First Amendment attorneys to represent him “in a major international case.”

“I want to sue the British home secretary for defamation,” he said, “for linking me up with murderers because of my opinions, my writings, my speaking – none of which have advocated any violence, ever.”

Savage said the last time he was in Britain was about 20 years ago, and he had no immediate plans to return.

In an interview with the BBC, Smith said Savage, the No. 3-rated radio host in the U.S., is “someone who has fallen into the category of fomenting hatred, of such extreme views and expressing them in such a way that it is actually likely to cause inter-community tension or even violence if that person were allowed into the country.”

Savage said his message for Smith and the people of the U.K. is, “Shame on you. Shame that you’ve fallen to such a low level.”

“It’s interesting to me that here I am a talk show host, who does not advocate violence, who advocates patriotic traditional values – borders, language, culture – who is now on a list banned in England,” Savage said. “What does that say about the government of England? It says more about them than it says about me.”

Needless to say, the ban will probably backfire. It is likely to drive more people in the U.S. to listen to “The Savage Nation” and I’m sure more Brits are logging on to hear what all the fuss is about. Still, a western government trying to silence an unpopular voice is very troubling. Troubling for all of us.

When the tournament started, there were 64 entries. In the end, did it really matter how many teams were in the field? No one was up to the task of challenging Barack Obama for the No Quarter Trophy. He easily won his first National Championship as the Biggest Ass on The American Politcal Landscape with a textbook dismantling of Donna Brazile in the finals 69-31. The match was never close and give “The Little EngineThat Could” The Big Caboose credit, this was Obama’s closest match of the entire tournament.

It was the end of a Cinderella run for Brazile. The fourth seed in the At Large Bracket knocked off two top seeds, Chris Matthews and Keith Olbermann to reach the finals. The slick moves and persistent play of Obama was just too much for her inside power game. She tried to use her size and strength to her advantage, but Obama was just too quick to pin down and he easily glided around her gigantic frame.

Whether brushing off his shoulder, flipping the bird, ignoring the blatant misogyny emanating from his supporters and never once disavowing false claims of racism aimed at his critics, Barack Obama has proven to be an ass of historic proportions for an entire season. Since becoming President, he has not let his game slip a bit. Insulting the mentally challenged, bowing to Saudi Kings and spending our nation into oblivion, he has proven to have the staying power of a great champion. It is easy to see him potentially challenging Richard Nixon’s record of five straight titles.

Looking at this years challengers, who really has the game to step up and challenge him next year? This was Brazile’s best shot. Expect her to fade away. Pelosi, Reid, Olbermann, Michelle Obama, Timothy Geithner? It’s hard to imagine anyone challenging the one next season.

Then again, few of us imagined at the begining of the season, that Barack Obama would emerge and dust the field. So there is always hope for the others. For now, it is undisputed. President Barack Obama is the National Champion. Congratulations on your first No Quarter Trophy. You sir are undoubtedly the Biggest Ass on the American Political Landscape!

Thanks to everyone who voted and played along. Feel free to comment below.

It’s time to crown a new National Champion. The battle for the 2009 No Quarter Trophy is down to final round. The tournament’s top seed Barack Obama will try and keep his perfect season alive in a showdown against the little engine make that the big caboose that could, Donna Brazile.

They are holding their heads up high at CNN tonight as their contributor Brazile finished off an MSNBC two-step that will go down in the history books. The #4 seed in the At Large Bracket knocked off top seeded Chris Matthews in the regional finals and then pulled off a shocking upset of the Media Bracket #1 Seed Keith Olbermann in the National Semi-Finals. Olbermann hung in there, but at the end of the day, Brazile was the one that came out of the back room 54-46. She opened the lead early and kept it. Olbermann tried to get inside, but just couldn’t get around her as Brazile’s size, strength and determination were far too much for the soft and puffy Ivy Leaguer.

YOUR CHANCE TO VOTE IN THE FINAL IS BELOW THE FOLD.

While Big Donna has run together an impressive string of wins to reach the final, her task is formidable. Barack Obama has been destroying the competition from the opening tip of the first round. The Messiah walked on water and healed the infirm enroute to dispatching the Capitol Hill top seed Nancy Pelosi 76-24. Give Pelosi credit, that’s the closest score Obama has had all tournament long. Pelosi often does Obama’s work for him in Congress and paved the way for his presidency, but there was just no way he was going to let her have the glory of winning a National Championship. It’s the second year in a row, Pelosi was ousted in the Semi-Finals. Last year she was eliminated by the eventual winner George W. Bush.

So now, we have a grudge match. Brazile helped make Obama what he is today. Using her influence on the DNC and CNN to push his agenda at every turn. Expressing her “disappointment” in the Clintons whenever possible despite claiming to be an uncommitted Super Delegate. Yet today, she rides under the Obama bus. No cabinet position, not even head of the DNC. It turns out Barack just doesn’t need her anymore. He’s busy bowing to Saudi Kings and she is busy telling us that she never imagined a woman president until she saw Barack Obama taking the oath. What a match. What a pair of gigantic asses. How do you a pick a winner?

Just vote below

NATIONAL CHAMPIONSHIP TITLE MATCH

The polls will be open until midnight Saturday. When you wake up Sunday Morning, we will have a new National Champion. Please post your comments below as to how you reached your decision. Have fun.

March Madness turned into April Fools in the battle for the No Quarter Trophy. The Trophy is awarded annually to the person you decide is the Biggest Ass on The American Political Landscape. While exciting play and buzzer beaters are usually the norm this time of the year, the Elite Eight was blow-out city (which is also the name of one of Barney Frank’s favorite watering holes.) Not only were none of the national quarterfinal match-ups close, but the winners had these contests wrapped up moments after the opening tap. VOTE BELOW!.

It certainly seemed like the tournament selection committee knew their business as three number one seeds have made it to the semi-finals. The only non-number 1 to crash the party is the red hot Donna Brazile. The number four seed in the At Large Bracket humiliated the second seeded Oprah Winfrey 75-25. That was the closest of the Regional Finals.

Oprah’s size and weight advantage were just no match for the feisty Brazile who showed during the primary season that she knows how to play and win dirty. Donna now gets a crack at Keith Olbermann who had his way with Andrew Sullivan (and Andrew loved it) in the Media Bracket final. Olbermann was the leading vote getter in the entire round and racked up an 85-15 win. Keith was a huge favorite to make it into the championship game when this tournament started, but no one should be betting against Brazile at this point.

Over on the side of the brackets. Barack Obama easily disposed of the First Lady in the White House Regional Final. The Messiah was an 80-20 winner. It was a disappointing performance for Michelle, whose makeover as “Mom in Chief” seems to be softening the hard as nails image that propelled her through the election season to a number two seed. Barack showed his sharp elbows, when despite the fact he was winning this one going away, he bowed to a Saudi Prince just to run the score up and remind everyone why he was the overall top seed in the tournament. Barry has yet to be tested in this tournament, but may have his hands full with Nancy Pelosi. The number one seed in the Capitol Hill bracket destroyed number three seed Barney Frank 85-15. After the game, Frank immediately made himself eligible for federal bailout funds. Pelosi has faced the stiffest competition so far, already beating Christopher Dodd, Claire McCaskill and Barney. If anyone can take a piece out of the Community Organizer in Chief, it’s Madam Speaker.

So without, further ado. Lets get to the voting. Just pick the person you think is the Bigger Ass in each match.

NATIONAL SEMI FINAL NUMBER 1
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NATIONAL SEMI FINAL NUMBER 2
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The Polls are open until Tuesday Night at 8:00 PM EDT. Join us live on No Quarter Radio, Tuesday night at 9:00 PM for the Nocturnal Warrior Show. We will review the Final Four contests and handicap the National Championship game. Feel free to post your comments as to why you voted as you did below. Have fun!!!!!

Vote by midnight tonight! The Sweet 16 is in the books and we are down to just 8 contestants left vying for the No Quarter Trophy which is annually awarded to the person you decide is the Biggest Ass on the American Political Landscape. March Madness is always full of surprises and this year is no different. The Number One Seed in the At Large Bracket, MSNBC Hard Ball host Chris Matthews turned out to a softball player. He was no match for the cajones of Donna Brazile. While she appeared to be fading as the tournament started, the DNC terror upped her game and sent Tweety packing 56-44. This sets up a dream matchup in the At Large Regional Final between Brazile and the Number Two Seed Oprah Winfrey. Oprah humiliated Bill “Judas” Richardson 66-34. This bracket final redefines At Large due to the girth of the contestants who can both claim to have the biggest asses in the field.

And what a battle in the Media Bracket. The claws came out and Andrew Sullivan held off a furious charge from Maureen Dowd. The final score 52-48 (just 14 votes). Sullivan now gets to go head-to-head with top seed Keith Olbermann.

For all the Elite Eight Matchups and your chance to vote. Read BELOW.

Just pick from the matchups below. You determine who you think is the Bigger Ass in each contest. It won’t be easy.

White House Regional Final. It doesn’t get any better than this!
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Capitol Hill Regional Final. This one re-defines tight man to man defense.
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Media Bracket Regional Final. Who will be the one that comes out of the room at the end?
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At Large Bracket Regional Final. This one is exactly what it says it is. AT LARGE! Big Asses battling to be the Biggest Ass.
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Vote now. The polls close at midnight on Friday. On Saturday we will post the Final Four! And then join us on the Nocturnal Warrior show Tuesday night at 9:00 PM EDT when we do our National Championship Show and handicap the battle between our final two contestants. Feel free to post comments below as to how you arrived at your picks. Have fun with this.

The cream certainly rose to the top in the second round in the battle for the No Quarter Trophy. The second round of our March Madness tournament had few suprises and almost every match was a blowout. With the field narrowed to 16, we are down to the best of the best. To become our National Champion and wear the title of Biggest Ass on the American Political Landscape, someone will have to rise to the top over some of the most reprehensible people of our time.

BELOW, the scoop on the most suspenseful race last week (Michelle Obama vs. David Axelrod) and your virtual voting booth:

It was a surprising second round as three former National Champions were eliminated in matches that were not even close. Dick Cheney, Ann Coulter and Ted Kennedy (in a likely farewell performance) were all sent packing. The 12th seed in the Capitol Hill Bracket, Senator Claire McCaskill is the lone long shot left in the field as she easily disposed of the 4th seed John Boehner. The most exciting match occurred in the White House Bracket where number two seed Michelle Obama had her hands full with the 7th seed, David Axelrod.

Mrs. Obama pulled it out 54-46.

Your chance to vote in our Sweet 16 starts now. The polls will be open until 8:00 PM EDT on Tuesday. Here are the matchups.

White House Bracket
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Capitol Hill Bracket
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Media Bracket
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At Large Bracket
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Just vote for who you think is the biggest ass in each matchup. Feel free to post additional comments below. Have fun with this. Don’t forget to join us on the Nocturnal Warrior Show on No Quarter Radio this Tuesday night at 9:00 PM EDT for the Sweet 16 results and Elite Eight preview.

The first round winners were determined by your votes and revealed last night on the Nocturnal Warrior Show on No Quarter Radio. You can listen to that here. We did a review of last night’s so-called press conference followed by the tournament results. The show includes the scores, a review of the next round matchups and all sorts of commentary that we just can’t fit here.

Remember, your votes determine the winners. We are asking you to look at each matchup and determine for yourself who is the bigger ass in each matchup (We are not asking who has the biggest ass, although that may have helped Oprah and Donna Brazile in round one). Without further ado here we go:

ROUND TWO

White House Bracket

6th Seed Rahm Emanuel vs. 3rd Seed Dick Cheney

Capitol Hill Bracket

Media Bracket

At-Large Bracket

There you have it. Just use the polls as set up at No Quarter to determine your votes. The Polls will be open until midnight Friday. This weekend, we will reveal the “Sweet Sixteen,” and open up the voting. The “Sweet Sixteen” winners will be announced on next Tuesday night’s Nocturnal Warrior Show where we will break down the Elite Eight.

Feel free to add your comments about the matchups below. The key is to have as much fun with this as possible!

It’s that time of year. If you are one of the lucky Americans still working in an office atmosphere, you probably have been inundated with bracket contests tied to the NCAA Tournament. I love the tournament and watch those games religiously, but here at No Quarter we deal with more serious fare and not everyone is a sports fan. So on Tuesday night’s edition of the Nocturnal Warrior Show on No Quarter Radio, we created a tournament of our own. You can listen to the show here (I highly recommend it; it was one of our better efforts.)

We revealed a field of 64 participants vying for the No Quarter Trophy. Our National Champion will be the person you pick as the Biggest Ass on the American Political Landscape.

We’ve broken the field in four brackets seeded 1 through 16 and have determined the matchups accordingly. All you have to do is tell us who you think is the winner of each matchup.

This will be a round by round affair. You can list your winners in the comment sections here or e-mail them to me at nocturnalwarriorshow@gmail.com. First-round winners will be announced on next Tuesday night’s Nocturnal Warrior Show. Feel free to submit all of your logic for making your picks.

So without further ado, here are the matchups.

White House Bracket
1st Seed Barack Obama vs. 16th Seed Bill Clinton
8th Seed Joe Biden vs. 9th Seed Robert Gibbs
5th Seed George W. Bush vs. 12th Seed Lawrence Summers
4th Seed Timothy Geithner vs. 13th Seed Susan Rice
6th Seed Rahm Emanuel vs. 11th Seed Jimmy Carter
3rd Seed Dick Cheney vs. 14th Seed Colin Powell
7th Seed David Axelrod vs. 10th Seed Eric Holder
2nd Seed Michelle Obama vs. 15th Seed Condoleeza Rice

Capitol Hill Bracket
1st Seed Nancy Pelosi vs. 16th Seed Christopher Dodd
8th Seed Charles Rangel vs. 9th Seed Mitch McConnel
5th Seed Chuck Schumer vs. 12th Seed Claire McCaskill
4th Seed John Boehner vs. 13th Seed Norm Coleman
6th Seed Edward Kennedy vs. 11th Seed Rolan Burris
3rd Seed Barney Frank vs. 14th Seed Eric Cantor
7th Seed Joe Lieberman vs. 10th Seed John Kerry
2nd Seed Harry Reid vs. 15th Seed Larry Craig

Media Bracket
1st Seed Keith Olbermann vs. 16th Seed Katie Couric
8th Seed William Kristol vs. 9th Seed Dick Morris
5th Seed Ann Coulter vs. 12th Laura Ingraham
4th Seed Rachael Maddow vs. 13th Seed Markos Moulitsos
6th Seed David Shuster vs. 11th Seed Ariana Huffington
3rd Seed Maureen Dowd vs. 14th Seed Rush Limbaugh
7th Seed Joe Klein vs. 10th Seed David Broder
2nd Seed Andrew Sullivan vs. 15th Jamal Simmons

At Large Bracket
1st Seed Chris Matthews vs. 16th Eliott Spitzer
8th Seed Rod Blagoevich vs. 9th Seed William Ayers
5th Seed Caroline Kennedy vs. 12th Seed John Edwards
4th Seed Donna Brazile vs. 13th Jeremiah Wright
6th Seed Bill Richardson vs. 11th Seed Michael Steele
3rd Seed Tom Daschle vs. 14th Seed Bobby Jindal
7th Seed Howard Dean vs. 10th Seed Alan Greenspan
2nd Seed Oprah Winfrey vs. 15th Seed Tim Kaine

There, you have it.. Just post up or e-mail us your first round picks and we will pare the field down. Have fun with this!!!

U.S. Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid needs 60 votes to close the debate on the $410 billion dollar omnibus spending bill and bring it to a Senate vote. As of this morning, he is one vote short. A few moderate Republicans that Reid was counting on have yet to climb on board. The GOP has some amendments of their own they would like to add to this bill and are trying to leverage their votes to push their proposals through.

Reid may just have to give in to some Republican demands, thanks to a dissenting vote from his own caucus. Senator Robert Menendez of New Jersey, a member of the Democratic leadership is voting no and is downright pissed off.

His anger has nothing to do with the massive spending by a government already in unfathomable debt or even the 9,000 plus earmarks attached to this drunken Capitol Hill spending spree.

What infuriates Menendez is that when his legislative aides read through the legislation online, they discovered language that eases restrictions on travel to Cuba and importing Cuban goods. Menendez would be the first to admit that he holds a minority view when it comes to dealing with the Castro government. As the son of Cuban immigrants, he has always taken a hard line on Cuban policy. He undoubtedly knew that with the Obama administration in charge, a change in policy was coming, but the way this was handled really has him steamed.

Shailagh Murphy reports in the Washington Post that Menendez even held off support on some administration appointees in protest.

“The process by which these changes have been forced upon this body is so deeply offensive to me, and so deeply undemocratic, that it puts the omnibus appropriations package in jeopardy, in spite of all the other tremendously important funding that this bill would provide,” the enraged son of Cuban immigrants said last week on the Senate floor. Menendez even slapped a hold on a pair of Obama nominees to draw attention to the issue.

Treasury officials, working with Reid’s office, continued yesterday to search for an administrative resolution with Menendez that would ensure a narrow interpretation of the legislative language in order to prevent gaping loopholes from developing. Menendez has pointed out that, had the bill sought significant changes in U.S. policy toward Iran or Venezuela, lawmakers would revolt. “What’s the difference with Cuba?” said Menendez spokesman Afshin Mohamadi.

No doubt, that Reid at some point will wrangle that last vote and everyone on the hill will have their pork and eat it too. He will even find a way to pacify Menendez. Yet, this little incident is just another reminder of why our government is broken to begin with. The Cuban issue is important enough to deserve its own debate on the floor. In typical congressional fashion, it was tacked on to a bill that had nothing to do with the issue. Whoever, added it to the omnibus spending bill was probably figuring that Menendez and his staff would not actually read the whole thing until it was too late.

It’s amazing what happens when your legislators have time (or at least their staffs have time) to read what they are voting on. The Menendez staff probably was going through this bill because lawmakers are starting to feel the heat after the e-mails and phone calls from angry constituents following the stimulus vote. They never expected Cuban policy to be part of the legislation they were reviewing.

Whether or not, the Cuban policy needs change is not the issue. The issue is that it shouldn’t have been in this bill in the first place. So good for Bob Menendez. Make Harry go find his vote somewhere else. It will certainly cost him.

Barack Obama would not be where he is today without Howard Dean. The former Vermont Governor and DNC Chairman created the blueprints that David Axelrod would expand upon to garner the 2008 Democratic Party presidential nomination for the junior Senator from Illinois. In 2004 Dean built a presidential nomination campaign based on grassroots support and small internet donations. He energized the net roots and helped the far left blogosphere find a voice and influence.

Dean did not succeed, but Obama’s team had four years to study what he did right and where he went wrong. They found ways to exploit regulations involving internet donations, control the flow of information on blogs and add some old fashioned Chicago wrangling to the caucus game.

After losing out in 2004, Dean’s consolation prize was to chair the DNC. He took a party stung by the loss of John Kerry and the despair that followed and helped energize it. His 50 state strategy helped pave the way for Obama’s red state organizing and was key to providing President Obama with the congressional majorities he now enjoys. Dean also helped stack the deck in Obama’s favor. The Florida and Michigan mess played out Obama’s way thanks to a heavy DNC hand, the DNC stayed remarkably silent over documented instances of caucus fraud and even this most progressive party chair had nothing to say over the mistreatment of Senator Hillary Clinton and the outright misogyny displayed throughout the campaign.

This of course makes Dean the perfect passenger for a ride under the Obama bus.

Howard Dean probably never expected to stay on as DNC Chairman following the Obama victory. Tradition has the President selecting his “own man” to head the party. Even so, it would be hard for Governor Tim Kaine to deliver for Obama the way Dean did. Dean was apparently not even welcome to the press conference where Obama tapped Kaine to be the next chair. I am sure they made sure the door didn’t hit Howie in the ass on the way out. One could imagine Obama saying “thanks for the help there Ho (an endearing term used by the rappers the President enjoys), but we won’t be needing you around here anymore.”

Today, there just happens to be a help wanted sign on the office of the Secretary of Health and Human Services. There is probably no Democrat as qualified for this position as Howard Dean. He is a doctor and former governor with a record of expanding health care opportunities for the residents of Vermont, particularly children. He is a favorite with the progressive base that will called upon to generate support for some form of nationalized health care and has proven he can organize and win political battles.

He also has no shot of landing the job (although his odds are slightly better than Tom Daschle’s.) White House insiders say there are worried that Dean is too divisive and partisan to bring Republicans into the fold. Some GOP support will be needed to get any kind of meaningful health care reform through the Senate. White House Chief of Staff Rahm Emanuel is also no fan of Dr. Dean. The two apparently had some real knock down, drag out battles over how DNC funds would be used in congressional races back when Emanuel was the head of the Congressional Campaign Committee.

Dean no longer has any real value to the Obama administration, he has given them all he can. If they really wanted him at HHS, they could have him. They could leave the GOP wooing to someone else and let him just work on the policy. However, Dean is used up as far as the Obama team is concerned and just not worth any potential headaches.

The net roots are trying help Dean’s case with petitions and postings and old liners like Tom Harkin are pushing his candidacy, but it is all for naught. The word on the street is that Kansas Governor Kathleen Sebelius will be the pick (once her tax returns have been vetted by a team of 50 different accountants.) She is a one time state insurance commissioner and has spent the last eight years as a Governor overseeing a state medicaid program. Coming from red state Kansas, she is skilled at working across party lines. It will be a surprise if she is not the pick.

As for Howard Dean, well hopefully Sebelius will craft a plan that covers injuries sustained while being run over by the Obama bus.

It turns out that Barack Obama’s administration was not exactly ready on day one (funny how those who are suddenly finding a critical voice, like Maureen Dowd, fail to mention their lampooning of Hillary Clinton who made “Day One” a campaign issue.) Discovering that his on-the-job performance was eroding his rock star image and loosening the support of his enormous fan base in the main stream media, the President turned to David Axelrod to help get his groove back.

Axelrod is no different than Karl Rove (although, I vaguely remember candidate Obama telling us he was going to end the permanent campaign in his White House) in that he has no interest in or talent for government. His job is to get people elected and keep them in office. Axelrod’s solution to the problem of “The Incredible Shrinking Community Organizer in Chief” was to get him back in campaign mode. The plan called for two town hall meetings and a nationally televised press conference. Sound bites and You Tube clips of the President in front of swooning crowds and a carefully orchestrated press gathering with no follow-up questions would help provide a little stimulus to his sagging fortunes on Capitol Hill.

The first stop on the “Bolster Barry’s Image” tour was Elkhart, Indiana. Axelrod is certainly a master of symbolism. Indiana helped put Obama over the top in November and the exceptionally tight nature of the state’s primary kept Hillary Clinton from gaining any more ground. More than that, Elkhart’s local economy is a disaster.

If you live in this part of Indiana, the likelihood is you work in one of two industries: 1) manufacturing recreational vehicles or 2) manufacturing recreational power boats. These are two industries that can often be looked at as bellwethers for the nation’s economy. Both are big-money purchases for strictly leisure purposes and usually require large amounts of financing. After purchase, they both need hundreds of gallons of gasoline to power a weekend’s worth of use.

RV and boat sales started sliding dramatically two years ago and are virtually non-existent today. RV lots and marinas are choked with two years’ worth of unsold new product inventory. Even, if people were interested in purchasing one of these items today (the price of gas is actually attractive right now), the banks have pretty much shut down financing options for buying either. The factories are either closed completely or operating with severely reduced work forces.

For the people of Elkhart, I’ll quote Bruce Springsteen who once sang in ‘My Hometown’; “Foreman says these jobs are going boys, and they ain’t coming back, to your hometown.”

The reason these industries tanked ahead of the rest of the economy was the result of the dramatic shift in our national economy during the Bush administration. With the top 1% of salary earners taking home 20% of our total income, these high priced toys became simply out of reach for too many Americans. The top 1% of the population just doesn’t include enough people to keep these industries alive. A few $1,000 stimulus checks are not enough to get the middle class back into considering the RV lifestyle.

What the stimulus package does not have and what the assorted TARP plans do not provide is a way out for Elkhart. Yes, some of these people can be put to work building schools or repairing aging highways and bridges, but those are temporary assignments. The people of Elkhart need a plan for a new economic future. Outside of converting those RV plants into manufacturing hybrid buses for the President to shove Joe Biden under, I am not sure what those people can do next.

And that is the fundamental problem that President Obama has yet to address. Our national economy needs a complete overhaul. The principal product that the United States has manufactured for the last 20 years is money. We were incredibly ingenious in finding ways to do it. Whether it was the dot com boost or the housing boom or creating complex financial securities, we were manufacturing cash like never before. Well that’s over now. So what do we do next?

The way out of the Great Depression was war. The last thing any of us want to see is the RV factories converted to armored vehicle manufacturing. This President needs to get all of his alleged smart people in the room and start figuring out how to create a new American economy. Temporary stimulus is not the answer. Permanent solutions are what is required.

That is what the government needs to be concentrating on. The people of Elkhart and the rest of us are depending on it. If they don’t begin to address this soon, then even David Axelrod may not be able to save the President.

(Above) Tom Daschle shows his former colleagues the apparent size of his tax debt

I’ve been spending a lot of time lately applying for jobs. Millions of Americans are doing the same thing. It’s a never-ending stream of postings, applications and online forms. You have to disclose all sorts of personal information, just so some algorithm can pull out some keys and decide whether a human resources assistant will even glance at your application. The computer program is looking to disqualify you from the get-go. This way, when an actually employed human looks at whatever candidates are presented to them, there is a good chance at seeing people who are qualified to take the position.

I bring this up, because it appears that President Barack Obama’s administration has not quite mastered the vetting of job applicants as well as the thousands of American businesses that use Monster and Career Builder. Most job applications ask job seekers about crimes they may have committed. Many applicants intentionally leave this blank and hope that background checks will not reveal past transgressions. It rarely works. It is too easy in this day and age to do a little internet snooping and discover anyone’s dark secrets.

So, let’s say you are a job applicant. You fill out the forms and everything looks great. Then, your employer discovers that you have already defrauded the company you are seeking employment from out of $45,000 or even $140,000. Do you think you are getting that job? Any employer that applies minimal amounts of good business practices will turn to one of the hundreds of other applicants who just happened not to steal from them.

That’s where we are with Secretary of the Treasury Tim Geithner and Health and Human Services nominee Tom Daschle. One hired and one about to be by the very employer they stole from. Yes, many Americans commit tax fraud every year. It’s almost a badge of honor to find ways to avoid paying the IRS. Here’s the problem, when you are an employee of the U.S. Government, not paying your taxes is not only tax fraud, it is stealing from your employer. Embezzlement, white collar crime.

To make matters worse, Geithner now oversees the Department of the Treasury and thus the Internal Revenue Service. He is in charge of enforcing the tax code. I have a feeling that if I put on a job application for a pharmaceutical sales executive position that I have a history of addiction to prescription drugs and have obtained them by illegal means, that I am not going to get the job.

As for Daschle, as Senate Majority Leader his taxes were looked at through a microscope for years. He would not overlook little things like a car and driver worth more than a quarter of a million dollars. It’s clear that once out of the Senate he thought certain things would not be noticed. In other words, he had no problem defrauding the U.S. Government, embezzling from his former and possibly future employer.

What does all this say about the folks doing the hiring? President Barack Obama has been telling us for two years, that he will change the culture in Washington. “Change has come”, “Hope and Change”, we’ve heard it time and time again. It appears that giving a cabinet position to Tom Daschle is no different than if George W. Bush decided to give one to Trent Lott. I can only imagine the exploding veins in Keith Olbermann’s neck if that happened.

The chances for hope and change are slim and none. And slim just pulled out of town in the back of Tom Daschle’s limo.

Whether you are a traditionalist and prefer the Neil Diamond version, or a late night bar patron who goes for a rousing Jimmy Buffet sing-a-long, it’s a good day to break out this seventies classic. Speaking of Neil Diamond, the Jazz Singer was on cable the other day and I have to wonder if Sir Laurence Olivier rolls over in his grave every time that piece of crap is shown. But, I digress. Here’s is why we are singing this morning.

“I informed Governor Paterson today that for personal reasons I am withdrawing my name from consideration for the United States Senate,”

Caroline Kennedy’s people issued that one sentence statement late last night after a bizarre evening of revelations and denials.

The New York papers started reporting on the withdrawal early Wednesday night and the reports were quickly followed by denials from members of the Kennedy camp. Finally, all speculation was put to rest with the one sentence withdrawal using the shopworn but always effective excuse of “personal reasons.”

The New York Post claims the withdrawal came after Kennedy learned she would not be Governor Paterson’s selection to fill the seat once held by her slain uncle Robert F. Kennedy. On the other hand, if you read the New York Daily News they will tell you that she was still the pick as late as 24 hours ago.

Knowing New York state politics as I do, I still think that if Caroline really wanted to follow through and take this seat she would have been the pick. David Paterson is not in a position to put himself at odds with Caroline’s principal sponsors President Obama and New York City Mayor Michael Bloomberg.

As it is, he is going to face a bruising election battle (I can’t say re-elected since he was not elected governor in the first place) in two years and he will need cash and support from Obama Democrats and Bloomberg to stay on the sidelines.

So why did she drop out? What are those personal reasons? We can only guess. But, Uncle Teddy’s health isn’t it. He was already dying when she made the decision to pursue the seat. That may sound crass, but it’s true (and I’ve already subjected you to Neil Diamond.) I think it comes down to matters of privacy and who she really is.

Caroline got the bug about public service while on the trail stumping for President Obama. She was met everywhere she appeared by adoring throngs of “hopium stoned” Obama groupies who cheered, hugged and enveloped her in an intoxicating blanket of Obama love. They cried when they told her how “The One” was carrying on the legacy of her father. It had to be a great feeling. Why wouldn’t she want more?

The media shielded Obama from harsh study, so why wouldn’t it be the same for her? She could go to Capitol Hill, work for the people and feel the love. It sounds pretty appealing. The problem was Caroline forgot about one thing. New Yorkers are a tough crowd, even for those they like. You need thick skin and sharp elbows to swim in those cold, shark infested political waters. While many Kennedys are built that way she isn’t and New York is still Clinton Country. Hill and Bill supporters aren’t particularly fond of the Kennedys these days and they were leading a charge that had her public opinion polls slipping daily.

While Paterson would have probably picked her in the end, just knowing he really didn’t want to had to hurt her. The jabs from the media and You Tube crowd over her brutal interviews had to sting even more. Re-opening old family wounds from her cousin’s unseemly divorce from Andrew Cuomo just made it worse. Then she learned that the private questionnaire she filled out for Governor Paterson with very personal Schlossberg financial information could be made public. For the Kennedy who at public events (before Obama) usually chose to sit in the back corner, it was all too much. She really didn’t want it after all.

It’s not that she was unqualified (as so many have claimed). Caroline Kennedy is probably as accomplished as many already serving in the Senate. Many have come to the Senate with no prior public service, even from celebrity backgrounds (Senator Bill Bradley, for example) and have served well. But, they were elected.

An appointment from the Governor is something else. That person needs to be the most qualified to serve all the people of the state and should have a public record worthy of such a rare opportunity and Caroline did not.

Her withdrawal is a stinging rebuke for President Obama. Her appointment was going to be his opening to break the Clinton hold on New York State Democrats. Bill and Hillary have been loyal soldiers for the party in the state. They’ve personally donated to numerous campaigns for Congressmen, State Senators, Assemblymen and County Executives etc. More importantly, both have headlined at countless breakfasts, brunches, cocktail parties and dinners allowing the hosts to raise thousands of dollars off the Clinton name.

The Obama camp does not like seeing so many powerful leaders beholden to the Clintons. Caroline was going to be the new star, injecting tons of Kennedy cash and star power to the New York game while Hillary is forced to temper her activities in accordance with the protocol of being Secretary of State. With one sentence from Caroline, that plan is toast.

Now the likelihood is that whoever Paterson picks will not be a loyal Obama solider. Andrew Cuomo is his own man, part of a rich New York legacy and Clinton supporter to boot. Carolyn Maloney is her own woman.

Yup, good times never seem so good.